ohsodazzling

the end of 2011

2011-12-31T00:51:00.005+08:00

its the end of another year again. well.. i hate endings and dont really like to celebrate it.. however, i do enjoy a new beginning.. how contradicting i can be isnt it.

ok let me get down to penning down all my thoughts for 2011.

hmmm.. it has been a year of changes for me. some really really really good and some really really really bad.

i shall start with the all the swirling happy stuff!

BEST OF 2011!

1) BRACES
oh yea! my greatest achievement in 2011! omg.. i would have never thought i would have so so much courage within me to even visit the dentist. i use to have such great tremendous fear about him (no thanks to primary school's dental experience) I mustered up all the courage in the world and simply stepped into a random dental clinic, booked an appointment and never looked back. Allowed him to jab me for god knows how many times, plucked 4 tooth and did my teeth fillings. well.. it costed my mum quite a bit to get everything in order.. i am so thankful for a great mummy who paid for it!

2) 21st
yes! its the special year of my 21st! it was simply amazing. i can never thank God enough for these little angels he placed in my life. the blessings i received from my family and friends, were so so much that i manage to clear my poly study loan within a year!

3) taiwan trip with the family <3
its our first family trip in like, i think, 6 years? i mean dont talk abt gg to malaysia during CNY. my family is kinda huge with different schedules and interest, its really hard to get everyone to agree on dates easily. thank God for a brother that sponsored the air ticket for us all and of course, the sister who paid for hotel. nonetheless, it was such a great trip, where everyone simply relaxed and enjoy each other's company. we shopped, ate, sightsee, laughed, joked, played and do new stuff together (like we went dolphin watching!)

4) finally shed some fats
its related to point 1 actually and also my determination to look slim on my 21st. hahas. i can finally see the difference in size comparing photos from last year and this year. yayness!

5) University
officially a undergrad. its been a year since i last studied, it was hard to adapt to it at first but i am still surviving! Thank God for his strength as i have to work and study at the same time. prelims gonna start in March 2012. i better buck up.

6) Fei Fei :)
well.. i was suppose to do a proper entry on that.. but i shall keep it for another day as the year is gonna to end soon.. those closer friends of mine will know anyway heehee

7) Yacht Trip
22/12/2011 - went on a half day yacht ride with the family & friends. first time on one & it was so exciting! photos soon!

8) Hosted
the usher saturday cluster outing! omg its such a scary thing to do and was really nervous. I know i seem like i can talk non stop but deep down.. omg.. i was panicking.. but somehow, i enjoyed it as i look back now. hahas. it was a great experience for me nonetheless.

EMO Stuff of 2011 :(

1) A Friend
i treasure every single one of my friends and placed them really close to my heart. However, i've lost one of my most treasured friendship in 2011. it was really saddening to me but well.. i guess life goes on anyway :) i just hope you are happy at wherever you are and with whatever you are doing.

2) Time Management
Neglected alot of my closer friends and often gave in to my laziness instead of meeting people. i ought to be shot. I am still learning the art of juggling school, work, church, family and friends :( i thank God for those who still stood by me even though i aint as free/available as before. a great big apology to all of you! i will do better next year!

3) Weight
i did not hit my ideal target! :(

4) Kel went overseas for half a year (without me)
half a year not seeing this girl! i miss you darling! cant wait for this girl to be back!

5) Goals, dreams & wishes
many left undone and i feel so guilty about it. sometimes, i really wonder what is stopping me from stepping forward and moving out from my comfort zone. need to do something about it in 2012!

overall, its been a great year for me! (the happy stuff clearly won the emo) Tons of changes took place but ya know the common say "change is the only constant in life" but of course! change only for the good.

i believe 2012 its just gonna get better & greater!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EARTHLINGS! LOVE YOU!

this is my last goodbye to you

2011-10-18T23:31:00.003+08:00

i have decided to let you go, is not because i dont love you but i guess, you simply dont treasure this love as much as i do.

i have no idea what made you to be who you are today.

frankly, i am disappointed. disappointed that the girl whom i once shared my cloest secret to, the girl whom i shared my ups and downs with, actually did cursed and sweared in my face.

what happened?

i question myself everytime someone asked me about you.

was there something i could have done to prevent such things from happening in the first place?

what happened?

this question remain unanswered. i dont know. i guess only you could answer this.

i know i was really harsh on you when i sent that last message. i thought it would be able to wake you up to your senses. i thought those words will shake you enough to make you realized you are seriously headed in the wrong direction.

but no, you responded 180 degrees from what i hoped you would.

thats when i knew, you are beyond me to do anything more.

i am sorry to have given up but i really have no idea how to hold on when you cant even be truthful to me.

i tried to find every reason to convince myself that you are still that same girl who bought a MR HAPPY stuff toy to cheer me up when i was going through a tough time in life.

i tried to remember all the great times we shared in Hong Kong and how you booked Hard Rock Hotel Room for my 20th birthday.

i tried to remember how you were always always there when i needed someone.

i just wanted you to be truthful but it seems all too difficult right now.

why did you give up on us so easily? were we that worthless to you? that for a mere profit of $50, you gave up your integrity?

i hope the life that you are living now is really something you want. i hope you are able to face that girl in the mirror every morning and say you truly love who she is deep down inside.

this is my last goodbye to you.

lil random surprise

2011-09-12T11:35:00.003+08:00

He handed me a Prada paper bag when i stepped into the study room. i was like.. OMG. are u serious???! (no, he didnt go an overseas trip)

he made us all very happy girls that night.

i know to some people, its just a Prada card holder, their family can easily afford it but my family aint that well to do, so Pradas and LVs dont exist often (for now) thus, this gift really means alot to me because, its a gift that stems out from a simple pure love.

its wasnt just the gift that made us all silly happy but the sweetest thought of him even wanting to surprise us on a no occasion day!

august & september :)

2011-09-06T21:33:00.004+08:00

i shall do some updates on my recent eventful week! :)

i am now officially unemployed but on my way to be a full time student. i miss schooling life. however, i would still need to work part time to support myself. my timetable is pretty slack. with only tuesday and thursday as my schooling days but is 6 hours of lecture back to back. God bless my soul.

anyway, so yup was thoroughly enjoying myself last week as i met up with keith tan @timbre, celebrated siak's 21st @TCC, cam whore crazy meet up time with the usher pumpkins @kallang macs and caught the lion king musical with the sis @MBS! ohh! and some cam whore pics of my nails! hahas love the green color that matches so well with iphone. ok i sound crazy to even match my phone to my nails. hahahs.

would post pictures soon after i find the time to resize them and all. my xiao bai is showing some signs of aging. is getting slower and slower if i open 2 windows or more. srsly testing my patience.

so yeah.. i have another 2 more weeks before i officially start school! this "holiday" i have a few things i wanna do!

1) jogging! (been putting this off for a long time!)

2) reading (complete at least one book!)

3) watch drama! (mei le jia you!)

4) spend more time with my ushers and friends!

5) find a part time job! (with good timing, good pay, good boss, good job scope!)

6) hopefully can squeeze in some short getaway to batam or staycation in singapore!

i am going to make this holiday a fruitful one (even though i pretty much slack my day away today thanks to my little cousin.. i can barely concentrate on my stuff when half the time i gotta to be screaming at him to do his holiday homework and the other half of the time i gotta scream at him to stop monkeying ard.. i swear i would want to have a daughter next time)

so yup! till then! :)

step by step

2011-08-24T00:01:00.003+08:00

step by step, i am missing you a little less each day.

sometimes, i guess i just gotta admit i am still human and weak afterall. i thought moving on would be easy since its not the first time such stuff happened. But it turns out to be difficult as well. ever since that night, my life has been a terrible nightmare. time ticks by so slowly and i swear a million thoughts ran through my mind. blame it on myself. i am a thinker. i like to have reasons to why things happened this way and that way. i like to have like a "confirmed" answer (maybe this is the reason why i enjoy doing accounts) i am weird this way.

so many times i was so tempted to text/call you, asking whether do you have answers to all of my questions about us. so many words left unsaid. up till today, i still dont believe you were brutally honest with me.

anyhow, like what everyone have been telling me, is all in the past now. no point getting all the answers to your questions because it aint gg to change anything.

even the taiwan drama said, "maybe i have lied to you about the reason for breaking up, but the break up is still real"

i just need to accept the fact you chose to walk out on me.

goodbye, and i'm gonna stop looking back.

please grant me grace

2011-08-15T11:31:00.001+08:00

it hurts so badly. much worst than i thought it will turn out to be.

i need to be stronger. much stronger.

please grant me grace

this is my 21st birthday!

2011-07-06T15:05:00.035+08:00

omg. i am 21 already! I am suppose to blog about my 21st birthday party so that maybe 10 years down the road, i can re-read this blog and remember all the good times. hahas

ok, honestly, my 21st party is like the first party i ever had in my entire life & let me tell you, is immensely stressful to have a party. so many things to worry about and almost 90% of the stuff is done by yours truly herself. trust me, i nearly went crazy and was so tempted to cancel everything but i am gad i didnt.

Date: 25th June 2011

Venue: Simsville condo, function room

Time: 1pm - 3pm

it was just a simple party, nothing fanciful with fireworks or magicians (though melvin did dress like one initially hahas).. yes, afternoon party. long story behind this one. but it was an amazing afternoon with much laughter & i am so thankful for all the friends that took the effort to come down. though i didnt get a Chanel bag as per my wishlist, i did get presents & blessings that really shocked me when counted them. truly thankful to God :)

also, thank you all who helped me in one way or another for the party, like kelly, jex, my sisters, cheryl, ethel & shijie. and of course, my mummy who paid for the whole thing (which really is not cheap! how can people have birthday party every year?!)

Here are the pictures! (Ok, having some prob with photobucket )

the family who never gave up on me <3

my cussie and his gorgeous girl

alycia and i!

kelly chin! awwwww <3

jex! :)

<3 <3

jeff! the leader that have impacted me the most!

section 4 team A ushers!

the usher leaders! :)

my fav group of ushers :) missing jelin

ex-cgms! :)

n454!

ex-E345!

ALICE! aka. jay chou's wife! hahahas

dennis cheok! aka self proclaimed jay chou

sock's happiest day of her life *winks*

lego! the princess wannabe!

nelson da monk! the first day of booking out! hahahas colin the extra

ohh.. you must be wondering what i did on the actual day, 24th of June, i went USS! sua ku i know. but that is the day i nearly died after taking the rollar coasters. I am a chicken srsly. I need to grow braver. but well, i conquered all! it was really crowded, thus, make our express ticket really useful. felt like VIPs cutting queue while everyone gotta wait for like 1 hour per ride. hahas. left by evening to join the cell and jocelyn baked a birthday cake for me! omg, i was so touched by her effort & gesture! and of course, it tasted really yummy too!

ohh! and my first few minutes of turning 21, i was in a lan shop @ parkway playing L4D2 with jex, colin and siak hong. hahas. all these pretty much sums up my 21st with some other late celebrations with other smaller groups of friends.

here it is, cheers to 21st! :)

the girl with a pearl necklace

2011-05-23T09:09:00.003+08:00

this story really speaks alot to me. hope you love it as much as i do.

the girl with a pearl necklace

The cheerful girl with bouncy golden curls was almost five. Waiting with her mother at the checkout stand, she saw them: a circle of glistening white pearls in a pink foil box.

"Oh please, Mommy. Can I have them? Please, Mommy, please!"

Quickly the mother checked the back of the little foil box and then looked back into the pleading blue eyes of her little girl's upturned face.

"A dollar ninety-five. That's almost $2.00. If you really want them, I'll think of some extra chores for you and in no time you can save enough money to buy them for yourself. Your birthday's only a week away and you might get another crisp dollar bill from Grandma."

As soon as Jenny got home, she emptied her penny bank and counted out 17 pennies. After dinner, she did more than her share of chores and she went to the neighbor and asked Mrs. McJames if she could pick dandelions for ten cents.

On her birthday, Grandma did give her another new dollar bill and at last she had enough money to buy the necklace.

Jenny loved her pearls. They made her feel dressed up and grown up. She wore them everywhere--Sunday school, kindergarten, even to bed. The only time she took them off was when she went swimming or had a bubble bath. Mother said if they got wet, they might turn her neck green.

Jenny had a very loving daddy and every night when she was ready for bed, he would stop whatever he was doing and come upstairs to read her a story. One night when he finished the story, he asked Jenny, "Do you love me?"

"Oh yes, Daddy. You know that I love you."

"Then give me your pearls."

"Oh, Daddy, not my pearls. But you can have Princess--the white horse from my collection. The one with the pink tail. Remember, Daddy? The one you gave me. She's my favorite."

"That's okay, Honey. Daddy loves you. Good night." And he brushed her cheek with a kiss.

About a week later, after the story time, Jenny's daddy asked again, "Do you love me?"

"Daddy, you know I love you."

"Then give me your pearls."

"Oh Daddy, not my pearls. But you can have my babydoll. The brand new one I got for my birthday. She is so beautiful and you can have the yellow blanket that matches her sleeper."

"That's okay. Sleep well. God bless you, little one. Daddy loves you." And as always, he brushed her cheek with a gentle kiss.

A few nights later when her daddy came in, Jenny was sitting on her bed with her legs crossed Indian-style. As he came close, he noticed her chin was trembling and one silent tear rolled down her cheek.

"What is it, Jenny? What's the matter?"

Jenny didn't say anything but lifted her little hand up to her daddy. And when she opened it, there was her little pearl necklace. With a little quiver,she finally said, "Here, Daddy. It's for you."

With tears gathering in his own eyes, Jenny's kind daddy reached out with one hand to take the dime-store necklace, and with the other hand he reached into his pocket and pulled out a blue velvet case with a strand of genuine pearls and gave them to Jenny.

He had them all the time. He was just waiting for her to give up the dime-store stuff so he could give her genuine treasure.

What are you hanging on to?

RANTS!

2011-04-21T14:24:00.004+08:00

best describes my daily mood.

officially started school this week. as in my bridging course for both maths & econs.

looking at my time table, its mad. if you see me still being sane and in one piece at the start of june, you ought to give me a trophy for this.

EVERYDAY, my schedule is like this.

830am - 530pm - WORK
530pm - 7pm - on the train/bus down to SIM
7pm - 10pm - STUDY
10pm - 1130pm - on the train/bus HOME

mind you, everyday for 5 days a week.

i have lessons on sat too, 330pm-630pm. PTL. what an awesome timetable SIM gave me.

i will be friendless for one whole month. and it doesnt help that i aint got any friends in class other than one person from maths. i know i know, yanbing and friendless shldnt go in one sentence. but everyone is soooo quiet. there are times i am shy you know. hahas

ok, actually, its kinda good that i am friendless in class. cos i am actually more attentive when i am alone.

and work, is beginning to suck. not becos of job scope, but other reasons. i shall not say too much here in case i am being stalk. hahas.

so, friends, if i reject your dates for the next one month and a half, please be understanding. i only have sundays to breathe. i dont even have time to eat a proper dinner before gg to classes.

did i mention i have to miss all cgs and sat services till the course ends? :( SIGH. but thank God for THUNNY who i will be gg sundays with. its been long since i went for a svc with her!

the 5 love languages

2011-04-15T12:05:00.006+08:00

i am sure many of you would have heard of the 5 love languages in the world.

for a short summary, these are the 5 (in no specific order),

1) Words of Affirmation
2) Quality Time
3) Receiving Gifts
4) Acts of Service
5) Physical Touch

well, i have known about this 5 love languages since i was really young. like 13 years old or 14 years old? i rmb PK spent a few weeks sermon touching on each and everyone of it. its one of the most interesting sermon i enjoyed cos it really made me get to know myself better.

i rmb i had this ranking of preferences for the above 5 love languages.

when i was 14 years old - 17 years old, my ranking was:

1) Words of Affirmation
words can make/break me cos i really believe in everything that one person say. i wouldnt doubt anyone. i simply trusted everyone ard me. so my family and friends opinions matter alot to me. i always believe family/friends sometimes, is able to see a clearer picture in my life better then myself.

2) Quality Time
if you know me, i kinda can chatter away with almost everyone and anyone. i heart quality time! iactually dont really fancy group outings. i prefer 1 on 1 outings! cos its where undivided attention is given. and i dont like to text when i am outside with friends.

3) Receiving Gifts
who doesnt love gifts? where your treasure is, there your heart will be :) i strongly believe in this.

4) Acts of Service
i aint the kind of girl to get a guy to carry my bag (unless my bag is boyish looking enough) i will be really touch if you go the extra mile for me. like picking me up everywhere i go!

5) Physical Touch
this is kinda my last. aint the clingy kinda girl. but i do appreciate still! just not as much.

anyway, thats like 4-5 years ago?

recently, i realized, love languages can actually change in ranking. maybe its our perception of life has changed, we all grow up, gotten hurt, betrayed, abused. such nonsense in life do happen. and much as we all have moved on, memories will still remain. those hurts will always leave behind a imprint, like how you step on wet cement. we all became a little more protective, more guarded, more judgmental based on our own experience.

its just amazing how i see myself evolved and how ppl ard change too. for the better or for the worst? i guess we are our best judge. its kinda scary isnt it. i dont know.. to me it is.. is like the girl that you stare in the mirror is no longer the same, though it has the same heart beating within that rib cage. just weird. sometimes i do ask myself, so which is the real tan yan bing sheronica? that girl or this girl now? just confusing.

at this point of time, i know kelly chin will most likely to tell me to stop thinking too much. hahahas.

so well, like i was saying, now that i am older (yes, 21 this year *GASPS*) i have changed, and so do my preferences in love languages. now, heres the ranking,

1 & 2) Words of Affirmation / Acts of Service
its kinda a tie between acts of service and words of affirmation.

Actions speaks louder than words isnt it? instead of saying "i love you" why dont you just show me through actions, that you truly love me? time to walk the walk. but i still need my dosage of affirming words :)

3) Receiving Gifts
obviously, chanel pls. hahas kidding.

well, like i said, where your treasure is, there your heart will be.

you can give without loving, but cant love without giving.

i believe in expensive gifts, not because i am materialistic but, i know if you are willing to part with that kind of money, i have a better standing in your heart than money is! of course, to each one his best luh. not everyone need to get me a chanel luh. if i know that watch you bought for me would need you to save up 1 month for it, it will be worth more than a chanel.

4) Quality Time
i still do enjoy quality time k! you need time to pass me my presents what. hahahahs kidding.

5) Physical Touch
i am still that the touchy kinda girl. i dont need you to kiss me whenever we are on an escalator. hahahahs.

nv have i expected my love language to change. i wonder how i will be like 5-10 years down the road. maybe physical touch will be my top choice! hahahs

re-pierced!

2011-04-12T09:25:00.002+08:00

yes! my ears are pierced again! dont worry, is just my first ear hole.

i actually pierced this 3 years back? but accidentally closed it. so i have decided to get it pierce again so i can finally wear ear rings! hahahas specifically, CHANEL ear rings *HINTS HINTS*

i am so not use to seeing stuff stuck on my ears! hahas please help me pray it wont be infected over the next 4 weeks. decided that i should leave it on for a little longer to ensure that it doesnt close again.

indeed, re-piercing ear holes are more painful then doing it for the first time. my ear lopes went red for the first 5 mins? and i can feel pain. the first time i pierced, i rmb it wasnt even as painful. its ok! beauty over pain! hahas

since i was taking photo of my ear holes, i have decided to reveal a tiny secret of mine. its not big deal really. but it explains why i find ears ugly. hahahas i have mention this before, my ears cant be seen whenever i take a front facing shot like those in a passport photo. is not because my hair blocked my ears, but even without my hair, my ears still cant be seen. its really small. hahahas photo below as evidence.

so anyway, i met V up 2 weeks back and had mos burger for dinner. guess what happened?

yes, smartie me went to pour milk into my clam chowder soup. i was talking on the phone and was pretty distracted. cant really multi tasked for nuts. hahahas. my clam chowder tasted sweet! which was kinda gross. hahahas.

anyway, i got the "grow & share" $$ from the gov! damm thrilled. my first time getting this. you dont know how sian i was for the last few years cos the entire family got it except yours truly.

bought a new hot pink bedroom slippers for my office! yup! i am allowed to wear such stuff in office!

so cute pls.

something i read before i go off,

when i am bored in office

2011-03-28T15:15:00.007+08:00

sad news: my boss is back from his 2 weeks europe trip

good news: he is out for meeting the entire day

yup so basically, i am bored in office again :(

from my previous post, i was saying abt my new found shopping website, gmarket! i received the items already! well, i love every item! the quality is good and delivery was uber fast!

i got these three items by their courier service within 24 hours after i made payment! super efficient seller. and the courier service they engaged is awesome too! i requsted for a change of address and yet they did their re-delivery within the same day of my request. many would know, its not such a case with singpost. they need at least 1-2 days before they even re-deliver ur item if u miss the postman.

the courier service they used!

really satisfied.

and i got my dress from another seller of the other website. she is super efficient too! i got my dress the next day after she posted it out :)

i am still waiting for another 2 parcel to reach me! bought tony moly's face brigtening cream. looks really good! and best of all, only $7 per bottle which retails for $26 at their store in Bugis. hahas.

what are words

2011-03-25T14:32:00.000+08:00

this song left me tearing

Gmarket

2011-03-22T21:24:00.002+08:00

well, i am not too sure whether have you heard/shop at gmarket before.. Gmarket is basically something like ebay but they have a better variety of products and often have great discounts. However, cheap things do come with some trouble. Gmarket's listing has a very very bad format, ultra not user friendly. thus, though i know of its existence for almost 9 months, i have nv purchased anything from there.

since i am bored at home and its been quite sometime since i last went shopping, i hopped over to Gmarket to have a look.

after 1 hour, i got following 3 items.

1 pair of denim shorts, 2 basic cotton skirt (black & grey). guess the price?

*drum rolls*

$20!

only $20! thats like an average of $6.70 per item! shipping has already been included and its actually a courier shipping.

i cant wait for my items to arrive! hope it looks as good as what the pictures show!

also, i bought this dress (refer to picture below) for only $7. *pats myself on the shoulder* this is from a livejournal community site.

will update again once all the items arrive!

anyway, a short update!

last week flew past real quickly! cg chalet, hall shifting and our first svc at SUNTEC! no pics cos i am too lazy to resize them and all.. maybe next time.. hahas

also, i started my new job last monday at Aedge Asia! my company deals with skincare products and is located just at SIMEI. i take only 20-30mins to get to work! how nice. and best of all, the buses i take to get to work is usually empty and comes quite frequently. really thank God for this job. i am still trying to adapt to the work i need to handle. first time being an admin person. so many paper work to do! is a small company that just started business last year October, i only have 2 other colleagues.. so u can imagine its size. my boss is uber nice too!

needa do something else now. will do a proper update soon!

little updates

2011-03-13T17:07:00.002+08:00

its sunday! and prolly the last time i get to slack at home and do anything i like.

well.. this is becos i am starting on my new job tml! yup! the fateful day has arrived.

time literally flew past me. thinking back, i actually stopped working for almost one and a half month already! i cant believe i rotted my life away though in between i took on some events job. thanks to angels.

srsly, i still cant believe how timely everything fell into place. i rmb how one night i was just thinking to myself, since i am too lazy to look for a new job yet i am so broke, i shld work for events freelance manner. it was just a random thought cos events usually pay ppl well but it doesnt come by often. i went to bed without thinking much. the next day i woke up, theres this girl, michelle, whom i met at an event half a year back, suddenly called me up! i couldnt even rmb who she was! so she introduced me to a job for maybank event. and on the same day, my cousin called me too! and asked for help at his event! isnt it amazing?

and in addition, i went for only one interview and i was offered the job at the end of it! hahas. my new company is located at simei! cab fare only costs me $4 during off peak hours! in addition, i get to wear smart casual to work daily! the boss is uber nice too! though the salary i am getting now is just slightly lesser then what i expected, i didnt mind since i save alot on transport! i was thinking whether shld i jog to work daily since i am on my diet plan!

yes ppl, i am on diet. i am serious this time. i have been doing 40-mins cardio, 3 times weekly as stated in glamour magazine. and of course, much snacking has stopped. bubble tea has stopped too (instead of 3 koi per week, i am only drinking 1). big sacrifice. but i am so determine. so sick of just looking at skinny girls. i wanna be one too! hahahs

so thats about my life these few weeks. the upcoming week will be a busy one. other then work, every night, there will be some church things going on in preparation of our BIG move. so excited yet apprehensive of the countless duties ahead! just gotta keep up the spirit of serving!

packing up our dreams

2011-03-02T00:26:00.008+08:00

26th march 2011 marks the end of the 5 years in Singapore Expo. the place where my church grew and conquered great mountains. part of me cant bear to let it go, the other part of me is excited of what lies ahead for us.

yes, greater things have yet to come.

pictures!

this is the great army of ushers whom, to be, are the most faithful servants of God.

i will definitely miss this great great bunch of usher leaders whom we served week in, week out with. when times are tough, these are the people, just with their mere presence, encouraged me to keep on keeping on. there will always be a special place for them in my heart <3

my face here looks so sharp! hahahas

susan and i <3

CL (Catherine Lee) Zone <3

One of my Fav Girl <3

some problem with the polaroid photos. no matter how i resize it, it simply refuse to get smaller. hahahs.

there are actually tons of photos somewhere in various ppl camera. hahas. if your face aint here, doesnt mean i dont love u k? simply cos i dont look as good in those photos. hahas. afterall, this is my blog. if i dont look good here, who else will. hahas.

and and and, i got my phone GMASK-ED! Red with White Polka Dots! CUTENESS TTM PLS! i am so in love in my phone! so crazy. hahas got this deal online! made single layer (both front and back) for only $20! so worth it pls!

So cute right? i know. just like the owner. hahahas.

ok enough. i shld go and bathe now. hahahs

Phuket 2011 Day 1

2011-02-18T19:09:00.013+08:00

Country: Phuket, Thailand
Date: 11 Jan 2011 - 15 Jan 2011
Explorers: Kelly, Colin, Pei Xing
Accomodation : Hotel Andakira, $222 for 4 nights (including breakfast)

We booked our air ticket during Jetstar Promotion and it cost about $88 per person including all the airport taxes. Its a really good deal! of course, my air ticket is kindly sponsored by them as a birthday gift to me :)

Anyway, air fare could have been cheaper by $60 in total if its not because of a silly mistake made by me. i clicked the wrong flight timing -____-" i know. aiya, ppl make mistakes luh. hahas

Here are some tips when you book your airfare with budget airlines

Budget Travel Tip #1: If travelling in a group, lets say a group of 4, you do not need to buy checked in baggage for everyone on the flight heading to the destination. Just buy checked in baggage for 2 person as on the flight there,your baggage will usually be quite light. The other two travelers can just share. You can save about $30 (given $15 per pax like Jetstar) in that way. Remember, theres always hand carry allowance of 10kg! so not worries about exceeding. Unless you are telling me you are like Paris Hilton that changes 10 sets of clothing daily.

The downside to this is, you cant choose your seats on the plane.

Budget Travel Tip #2: I dont know how is it with other airlines, but in Jetstar, you need to pay $12 per name as administrative charges if you were to use your credit card to make payment. You could be paying up to $48 (for group of 4) just for Visa or Master to process your payment. Thus, always choose the offline payment method!

You can conveniently make payment within 48 hours at AXS machines or SAM machines. Even all 7 eleven outlets does the job for you! well, i am not too sure will 7 eleven charge you though. You might wanna check with them.

All in all, we saved $78 just by doing the above! :)

It took a little bit more effort, but i feel that is worth it.

The bad part about promotional airfare for Jetstar, they give you real sucky flight timing. its either late into the night or early in the morning.

Accomodation:

Hotel Andakira! we love our hotel to bits! its a 4 star hotel and they have good service! free wireless throughout the hotel and their front desk personnel is really smiley and kind! 4 of us stayed in the same room for $888 in total, including buffet breakfast! Its not exactly cheap but its their high season in Phuket, all hotel prices are all around that price (i am refering to only 4 star hotels)

Service there is good! we requested for like additional 4 pillows and extra blanket, yet they gave it to us with a smile! hahas and they provide beach towels for you too!

The location of the hotel is good though its not very near the beach. Patong beach is about 15mins-20mins walk away. but we are away from the crowd in Phuket! something i like as i hate to wake up in the middle of a mess. hahas. And just 5 mins away from our hotel, is where the club and pub scene is, the shopping mall is there too!

Budget Travel Tip #3: When booking hotels, you can check websites like www.agoda.com for better hotel prices :) there are many more out there! just google it.

Without further ado, let me spam you with pictures of the trip!

Day 1: we arrived at our hotel during midnight! checked in and went straight out to explore!

Many of the shops there closes at only 1am, 2am or even 3am. I mean shops ok! not just the pubs. hahas. The massage centre right outside our hotel closes at like 2am. real different from Singapore. I think they cater to tourists like us!

Food is really awesome there! Its not exactly cheap like mad, some meals we got con. i will come to that later. but the tastiness makes the money worth it.

OMG. this banana pancake shop has the BEST pancake i have ever eaten! its only 40 bhat per piece. we ate this every night religiously! drooling as i look at it now.

Thai Beef Noodle Soup

Double Cheese Burger (the patty is like 4 times thicker then ramly burgers in Singapore) - 100 bhat, SGD$4

all of us shared one

Stacking up thai cup noodles and snacks

Their petrol "station" Cool eh! hahas

At the hotel lobby looking at brochures to decide what day tours we wanna go for.

Four of us in the room!

The place where i lay my head for 4 nights

The little sculpture they made out of a towel, placed on every bed

Will continue with day 2,3,4,5 again. hahas. uploading pictures is such a chore.

procrastination

2011-02-18T12:16:00.003+08:00

oh yeah. finally submitted my SIM application yesterday! which is also the last day of the dateline. i need to kick the habit of "last minute", "theres still another day" out of my life. hahas. i was so damm scared on wednesday night cos i thought all my documents aint in place and if i cant submit by like thursday, i can so prepare myself to jump down swissotel.

I SAW JENNY AND GRACE WONG! i was like walking ard and i saw these two fav girls of mine from my polytechnic days! no one seem to be able to meet vanessa. nonetheless, i am kinda excited to school now! cos i can get to see them ard! working life is horrible. you have no time to catch up with ppl at all!

I think i shld get to blogging abt phuket. but i am so damm lazy to resize photos luh. anyway shortcuts ppl?

Spring Outfit

2011-02-16T23:59:00.002+08:00

Untitled by sheronica featuring platform pumps

angry like an angry bird

2011-02-10T16:42:00.002+08:00

omgthewholeworlddoesntrevolveardyou.whyareyousostubborn.

2011-02-08T13:04:00.002+08:00

i am unemployed once again. hahas. sometimes i wonder, if i actually stay put on the same job for the last 8 months, i would have become like some full time staff with full benefits. yet i have changed 3 jobs, in the short span of 8 months. its not that i am unfaithful or incompetent k! just that one of the company closed down and my last job, i have finished the 3 months contract with it. so here i am bumming ard at home once again. i am kinda to be happy at this kinda state yet i feel damm uselsss. its like.. waking up with no motivation in life.. hahas this is the workaholic in me speaking.

thus, i am gg to participate in something which i have not tried before. just look out for my next blog post!

there are actually a few things which i should get down to doing. though i have all the time in the world now, you know.. my laziness got the better of me for the last 2 days. my mummy has been nagging and i have been turning a deaf ear. what a bad girl.

let me come up with a list.

1) Clean up my room and pack all old clothes into a plastic bag (srsly, i have been saying this since before CNY. hahas)

2) Apply for UNI - the choice has been made (SIM-UOL Degree in Accountancy & Finance)

3) Go down to CASE to lodge a complain against JETSTAR

4) Complete my sister's team chart

5) SLIM DOWN.

bumming ard and with the newly opened KOI outlet at tampines, it aint exactly helping me with my diet plans. i have cravings for KOI almost every other day. hahas.

alright, let me get back to doing stuff now.

bye bye

by the park

2011-01-19T22:48:00.005+08:00

the sun will shine, just for you

went for a round of jogging just now(one of a goals this year :D)

running frees up and mind, thats why i love it. though it is tiring and difficult for me to even psycho myself to change my outfit and get to the park, i still love it. its a love hate relationship ah.

ytd night i thought about alot of things, about myself and how shld i even move on with my life. 2010 has been quite a bad year and i swear to myself i wanna make 2011 a real good one. but something within me is afraid. what if i fail again this year?

i guess thats one of the issues with grown ups (i know i am not exactly old OLD. but 20 is quite reasonable luh), we are too afraid to fall, thus, give up trying all together.

i saw a girl that looks like 16 -17 years old, learning how to cycle at the park (her boyfee is teaching her) when i saw it, i can clearly rmb the day i learnt how to cycle cos its at that same park where my brother taught me. I could tell she was really scared. she steers the handle too much and couldnt really get the balance of cycling in order to not fall (after jogging for 6 rounds, she still couldnt really cycle). i cant help but to think back, was i like this before too? let me be proud for once, i think i learnt how to cycle quite quickly. my bro aint the most patient guy ard, so i am quite sure i didnt take a LONG time. i can even rmb my bro telling me, "just cycle, once you fall/crash, you will know how to cycle after that" (what kind of rubbish is that! hahas) i rmb, off i went and somehow, i manage to balance but after 1 minute, i crashed into a guy and apologized like mad. hahahas somehow, when i went off, balancing and manage to cycle, i wasnt even afraid. to me, i trusted my bro. i am not even afraid of crashing into the tree.

i think thats what they say, "child's innocence" thats why u shld learn how to cycle and rollar blade when you are young cos you have no concept of pain. Thus, you wont even be afraid of it. you simply went ahead and try all the nonsense that looks fun like flipping down from a monkey bar.

if you ask me to do all that nonsense i did before now, i will tell you, NO WAY.

as grown ups, i guess we all have lost that element of boldness. through all the different ups and downs you go through in life, you became afraid to try. you rather play safe and not get hurt, then to put that foot out there and gain scars that speaks of experiences. i used the word "gain" scars cos, every scar have a story to tell and it is through those stories, we became stronger and better in some aspect.

but this element of boldness is essential for all growth in life. the moment you stop trying new things, thats the moment you stop living life as well.

one lesson which i walk away with before i left the park:

i wanna be a girl that will never be afraid of failing/falling

if theres one day, where there will be ZERO fear in your life (you will no longer be afraid of sharks, blood, roaches and etc), what will you do?

thats right, thats the thing you shld start doing it one second after you finish reading this.

good night lovelies.

<3

2011-01-18T21:14:00.002+08:00

home alone tonight.

the silence can be heard so loud. it overwhelms me.

my mind is cluttered with decisions that determines my life.

which path should i take?

silence.

on the 100th day

2011-01-02T23:22:00.003+08:00

hello dear ones! its 2011 already!

i have sooooo much things i wish to blog about! not just with words but with pictures as well! but its just damm troublesome to resize the pics and actually host it.. i have no idea why am i even this busy.. i barely can find the time to "nua" anymore. 24 hours just doesnt seem to be enough. i need to have better time management.

2010 hasnt been the easiest year for me. in fact, i was so looking forward to 2011. i swear i am gg to make this year the BEST year yet in my own life. not gg to be distracted like how i was in 2010, just gg to be plain focus on my goals. which speaking of which, i better get down to really jotting it down on a paper/book.

anyway, today, also marks the 100th day since my grandma passed away. relatives gathered back to my grandma's house for one last time. it was a good time of fellowship , i wonder when will be the next time we would be able to gather all the aunties and uncles back again. grandma house without a grandma just felt so different, it somehow felt so empty though it was filled with people. though i cant really communicate with my grandma before due to language barrier, just seeing her there provided me with some form of support and strength. her presence is what kept the family together. this year chinese new year is going to be different without her ard anymore.

i just hope daddy God is with her now, keeping her safe.

2010-12-02T22:02:00.002+08:00

I wanted to upload pictures today of my last 1 week of wisdom tooth experience, but mummy wanted to use the lappie, so i am back at using xiao bai for now. which is damm slow. hahas. i just realized i have way overdue photos in the S90. halloween. hahas thats like one month ago kinda thing. hahahs.

i have been on this shopping craze! you know how i was complaining abt nothing to buy in my last post? i went out shopping on monday, determined not to control any urge of mine. i simply bought whatever i like. which, i ought to give myself a pat on the shoulder, cos i spent like $100.90 only. the bill went like this:

1) Dorothy Perkins Light Pink Bag - $29 (ON SALE! MAD CHEAP)
2) Coral Polka Dot Shirt - $10 (BUGIS STREET HUNT, it was $25 when i wanted to buy it the last time i've been there)
3) Jade Loosed Puff Sleeve Top - $18 (BUGIS STREET HUNT)
4) Nude Shorts w/ a ribbon in front - $15 (Quality is good though is once again BUGIS STREET HUNT)
5) Mitju Cut Out Sandals - $26.90 (After a 10 % discount)

Total: $100.90

Hail the queen! i love every single item to bits. I am thinking to get the same shorts in navy cos i simply love the cutting and is only $15. but well. plans were ruined due to rain. oh well.. in addition to that list, i actually got a dress and another top online too! hahahas

Promise i will post pictures soon!

Also, Starbucks were having their CHRISTMAS GIVE AWAY thingy. Alice and i manage to get our coffee from the harbourfront centre outlet which surprisingly, has a pretty short queue. and there were this two typical singaporean aunties behind us, the conversation went like this,

*Two aunties came and stood behind us*

Auntie 1 said to Auntie 2: Eh, you stand here and queue first, i go to the front and see what are they queuing for..

HAHAHAHAAHAHS

True blue singaporean spirit.

and i tried a new drink today (since its free!), CHOCOLATE CARAMEL LATTE. i am sold. this will be my next fav drink after green tea frappe.

DID I TELL YOU? I LOST 2 KG AFTER ONE WEEK OF SOFT FOOD.

*JUMPS AROUND SCREAMING*

Another 8kg to go before i hit back my ideal weight!

2010-11-26T21:16:00.002+08:00

my 4 wisdom teeth has been officially extracted and my face is swollen like some ba zhang. i will post pictures soon. this marks my first time of undergoing GE.

thank God i aint experiencing much pain other then my swollen face and scars on my lips (i wonder why i have those scars)

i have been taking soft food, those of which i dont have to chew. i miss eating rice. srsly. cant wait for my mouth to recover! i wanna have buffet! (but thinking about my weight, i just feel like killing myself)

also, its black friday today! tons of online stores are having sale! i am trying hard to find stuff to buy, but somehow, i cant seem to find anything nice. sigh, its the i-got-money-but-nothing-to-buy-season. hate it. while everytime i am broke, there will be one hundred and one things i wanna get.

2010-11-24T23:58:00.004+08:00

look what came in the mail today! nope! is not new clothes, but a letter from jetstar! after reading this letter, i am a converted. budget airlines aint that bad afterall.

its a long story as to what happened, but basically, i booked the wrong flight timing and i couldnt get through their customer service hotline though i held on to the line for 40 mins. i had no choice, so i went to their website and make the change. However, i had to pay a penalty charge of $92 (I wouldnt need to pay if i can get them through the phone). feeling unjustified, i called them up the next morning and explain to them that they should refund me my $92 since it wasnt my fault that i didnt rang you them up to make the change, but their customer service line messed up and my call cant get through.. well.. obviously, they refused my refund.

so i wrote in to whatever department possible to bring this issue up. that was about 1-2 months ago. i received no news from them. i concluded that they are just gg to ignore me.

when i saw this letter popped on my table yesterday, i was prepared to read "Much apologies, but Jetstar will not by any means, make refunds"

but to my amazement, the content was not even near what i thought it would be. They apologised for my bad experience with their telephone hotline and THEY WILL BE REFUNDING MY $92 AFTERALL. this is not the best deal, on top of my $92 refund, they gave me another $50 Jetstar travel voucher. WOW. the guy who typed this letter, sure knows how to retain a customer. you bet i am damm happy.

though the amount of time they took to process my feedback was rather long (1-2 months wait!), at least they replied me with my desired answer, or in fact, exceeded my expectations on them. this is what customer service is all about!

and guess what! Pastor Phil preached about this during tuesday leaders' meeting when he shared about hospitality. one of the 7 points of hospitality is "DO EXTRA"

Jetstar did the extra for me and thumbs up for that! like what joanne peh said in her advert for them "THANK YOU JETSTAR" hahas, i am feeling that same joy. hahas

*DRASTIC CHANGE IN TOPIC*

during tuesday meeting, my butterfly died :( her wings broke and can never be worn again. RIP.

this is what happens when you buy cheapskate rings from forever 21. hahas.

*DRASTIC CHANGE IN TOPIC AGAIN*

i met keith up today. he is such a sweetie. he waited for me for over an hour and he never even complain once. i felt damm guilty and angry at myself for making him wait for such a long time (this is like the second time already), yet he never get pissed off. in fact, he will be the one who cheer me up. where on earth do you get those kind of patience from? thanks for being so so so patient with me. i dont think i can ever find another replica like you.

headed to chomps chomps to eat since tml is DOOMS DAY (my wisdom tooth extraction), i had to eat seafood before i abtain from it for 1-2 weeks. my most sinful meal of the week! ordered seafood from the wrong store thought :( doesnt taste as good

my fav dessert! bandung milkcurd! (ok, maybe not my ultimate fav but still one of my favourites)

yeah, tml 1045am onwards, you wont be able to hear my sweet, beautiful voice. srsly, i am damm scared. this is my first op in the last 20 years of my life. i have no idea what to expect. please say a short prayer for me if you are reading this. i will love you for life. hahas. i have zero tolerance for pain. omg. i will be a brave soul.

2010-11-24T00:07:00.005+08:00

in just a few days, life took a 180 degree turn. i am losing myself. srsly. but i am a fighter and i will be one. you must be thinking what on earth am i talking about?

well.. i will start now with my grandmother story but you bet, it is an exciting one.

theres is guy who claimed that he liked me since many many many months ago. his name is jonathan ho jia han, 20 years old. to be frank, i did consider about getting together with him and all, he WAS a really nice guy, at least thats what i thought, until recently, by some kind of divine appt, i stumbled upon this (refer to image below)

yes, jonathan baba ho is him. that guy called me a CRAZY BITCH to his sister yup, and that crazy headless duck is me as well.

let me make myself clear, i did not steal his money nor did i sleep with him (or anyone else for a fact)

ahem, now is for some background to that incident that he is refering to, in his nahming part about his job.

jonathan is not an O level kid, he has a A level cert under his name. he recently found a job and he is paid 6 bucks an hour. ok, yes he doesnt have any experience, but 6 bucks per hour for an office job? are u kidding me? i have a cute bestfriend, who is schooling in ITE now (by no means am i despising her), earning the same amt of pay, working part time. while he, A levels, able work for 3 months at least, full time job, is earning 6 bucks per hour.

being a nice friend, i told him to find a better job. he deserves a higher pay! i felt damm unjustified that he is only paid 6 bucks an hour. i told him to forget about that job, dont even waste the time to attend that interview. thats not his dream job btw. i admit i did nag quite a fair bit, cos he talked to me like as if he has never ever seen 6 bucks in his entire life before. he was happy to have 6 bucks per hour job but in actual fact, he is underpaid. i tried to talk him out of gg for the interview cos 6 bucks is simply not worth it. but of course, he refuse to listen and went ahead. so i gave up persuading him as well. i nagged till a certain point and stopped cos i know he wasnt taking in what i am trying to tell him: 6 BUCKS IS PATHETIC.

so we moved along with life, thinking all is well. we chatted, talked like usual and all for a week or so. until, i stumbled across this msg in his fb acc.

Now, before you think i am some stalker, I AM NOT, never will i do that to him. i was in his fb acc cos i got his sister who is in the states now to send some stuff over to me. She paid for postage first and i forgot the amt, thus, i went back in to check cos he was the one who told me to do so before. Since i have no idea which msg have the info, i went to click on his latest msg with his sister's name and ALAS, i found the comment as of above.

srsly, i feel damm unjustified. i was called a crazy bitch cos i showed concern to him finding a job and telling him he is underpaid. Advising him that he deserve better. Because of that, i am a CRAZY BITCH?

ok fine, he might be angry at that point of time when i nag at him, but the thing is, he did not show a tinge of anger. he acted like all sweet and nice, telling me not to worry so much about him. but a minute later of saying those words, he went online and called me a crazy bitch.

well well well, if you dont call this guy a two faced idiot, i do not know what else shld i call him.

i am thoroughly disgusted.

this is the same guy that said that he love me. this is the same guy that i trusted almost a 100% with my heart. but this is also the same guy that called me a bitch.

i am speechless. i have never felt anymore betrayed than now. my haters who calls me bitch, i dont care. i really dont. but a close friend who calls you a bitch? this is something new. i felt my heart slashed right in the middle.

what did i do to deserve this. srsly.

when i confronted him with this, all he said was, "i said it out of anger"

*clap clap clap* great excuse. do i look like some 3 year old kiddo here?

at least, i freaking graduated with a diploma this year. you dont fool me like that.

am i suppose to, awwww.. i will forgive you then since you said it out of anger.

NO. i dont freaking get it. SO WHAT IF YOU ARE ANGRY? you dont call your mum a slut even is you are angry at her. I never named him as a jerk/bastard even when he made me wait 3 hours at the airport for him (ALONE) during midnight when i have work the next day and later got ditched by him. was i angry then? you bet. but did i call him a jerk/bastard? i did not. cos i respected him as my friend still.

that sense of respect for the lady you love (at least you claim to love). where have that gone to? guys, srsly, u gotta respect your lady and u gotta treat her right. i hate to hear guys, ill treating their girlfriends. their girlfriend dont deserve it! (unless they fall into the category of slut, whores)

i shall stop ranting about it. forgive forgive. forgetting will take some time though.

one good thing that came out from this incident, i know who my true friends are and who have the best interest of me. i told my er jie about this and she defended for him. why is she still my sister? if my little sister tells me about this incident, man, you can be sure, i will kick his balls for my lil sister sake! you dont call me sister a bitch. but no, my er jie thinks is my fault. she thinks i agitated him into calling me a bitch. wow.. why do i still need enemies when i have a sister like her? srsly. the mouth and tongue is his, he can choose to call me an idiot monster, stupid, brainless and i wouldnt even be mad. but a bitch is way overboard.

alright. i am done with this.

will you still be friends with someone like that?

i am lost.

(Pardon my eng, i am damm tired and am in no mood to edit)

2010-11-17T00:54:00.001+08:00

the truth just sank into me, in approx. 8 days time, i am gg to have my wisdom tooth op. mind you, i am taking out all 4 at one time and mine grew INSIDE my gum, so, the dentist will be slicing my gum into two. shit. seriously, why do i have such tough life. have crooked teeth, now all 4 wisdom tooth grew inside my gum. seriously, i am freaking scared. scared is an understatement. i hate the pain. i cant take pain. once i am in pain, i feel helpless. 8 days.... o lord, give me grace

2010-11-10T21:46:00.002+08:00

hello yellow yellow dirty fellows.

i am finally home after work for once and i love the serenity of it. seriously, i came to love my crib more after i started to work. nothing can beat such peacefulness of the house. pure bliss.

well.. started to work in a new company since last monday. one word to sum day one till now: BUSY. i have never ever been so busy with work before (other then those event days when i was still working in terrapinn) I OT-ed most of the days and i tell you, is damm depressing. i gotta salute to those ppl who can actually OT daily. i nearly cried (but of course i didnt) when i had to OT-ed on monday. maybe because i had exciting plans at night to meet jex and thun.. but almost have to cancel it cos if work.. but that two sweetie actually drove down to vivo while they were at paya lebar, just to meet my for dinner. how can i ever not love them? totally sweet and turned my bad day into something beautiful <3

so my target daily is to not work OT and clear that mountain by 530pm daily. if others can do it, i believe i can do above and beyond! this is just some confession i do daily! :) lets hope for the next 3 months, it will really come to pass!

also, working with my sister can be so blessed. i had like coffeebean on tuesday morning, today i had spinelli. all FOC! cos i have real wonderful colleagues and sister! the spirit of generosity if everywhere! not forgetting the dim sum lunch the company paid for on the first day of work. it was so gooooooooooooooooooood! the egg tarts are to die for.

this week hasnt been easily, people come and go in your life. those you dont fit, will never fit no matter how hard you try to put them into your heart. i have no idea whether did i make the right decision of letting you slip away, but i can find no other way out.

TAYLOR SWIFT-BACK TO DECEMBER.

its the most emo song i have ever heard and its really awesome. i feel like learning how to play this song on the guitar but will need some help here. hahas. do read the lyrics. its really meaningful.

"you gave me all your love and all i gave you was goodbyes"

2010-11-07T01:16:00.002+08:00

been wanting to blog about this since last night cos i just couldnt fall asleep and this particular topic just came to my mind..

so recently and quite often, i believe you will hear things from your friends such as "i am taking a break with my girlfriend/boyfriend" or even, "we will wait till O levels are over or when he comes out of army..." yes, i use to be like this, i only wanna get attach to you after my O levels. hahahas. yes, i behave like this too and just a few days ago, i came to realise how stupid it sounded. this might offend some of you, but if you know me, i dont care and i speak how i feel.

let me explain and put into prespective why the above sentences sounds stupid.

if you really really really really really truly and surely love the other party, you wont even wanna wait for for even another second to get together. isnt that true no? yes, you might say, "but there are other pirorities in my life first that i wanna settle first". think about it, why do you wanna solve those "burdens" yourself when you can have another person being beside you, doing it together? many hands make work light isnt it? unless you tell me, he/she aint willing to go through such "tough" times with you or maybe the he/she is a burden to your life, then seriously, whats the point of a relationship? he is only interested in your good side and not in your bad. then what makes you so sure that he/she will be there for you in your tougher situations as life goes on? O levels aint the final exams he/she is gg to take, (and think about it, exams aint a big deal form the start) there will be plenty of tests and exams ahead... so you are telling me you guys will "break up" during such season?

what makes a couple's relationship stronger and sweeter is actually through such difficult times in life. it is when the character of both parties is tested, moulded and refined. if a break is necessary during such "tough" times, then it only shows how shallow the love is from the start. then i advice, move on and find the one that will never let you go even if you are a bald.

face it. stop thinking i will wait for him/her. wait till when? when all her/his problems are solved? then you can jolly well wait till he/she get to heaven (assuming that he/she gets there).

a relationship is only as beautiful as to the degree of obtacles both parties overcome together.

if he/she makes you wait for her or even take break in that relationship, there is only one reason: he/she just doesnt love you enough.

imagine this with me, if i am attached to lee min ho (if you dont know who he is, go google and drool at his cuteness. hahas) and i have exams/army/career coming up, never in my mind will think about taking a "break" with him so i can focus on exams/career. I NEVER EVER WILL. over my dead body. hahas RIGHTO?

ta-da! now i finally put down into words why is it i always feel so "HUH?!" when i hear my friends taking a break in a relationship. trust me, almost 100% of them never got back together, if not, got back for a few months and break up real soon. this is life, just gotta face it and move on. it aint gg to be easy, but oh well.. better then wasting time on something you know that will end anytime soon..

2010-11-04T00:22:00.002+08:00

halloween on sunday was such a great blast! i went as prisoner in the end (ok fine, it was a failed attempt cos my prison number and wording did not stick to my red jump suit) hahas. guess what! i actually found that red jump suit at home! I will update with more pictures soon! :)

for now, the two longest standing friend in the world! :) my slaughtered bunny and the evil butcher. ohh! i must thank VINCENT for editing these photos! he is surely a talent.

2010-10-27T11:51:00.006+08:00

ok, i cant decide whether is my tied up hair nicer or letting my hair down. thus, it explains my cam whore pics in this post! & my experiment with this app on my iPhone. yes, i have heard your feedback to my hair. "Man Tou, Tuk Tuk" hahahas all these boils down to one word: CUTE. thank you~ see how optimistic i am! hahahas some photos are repetitive cos i was just experimenting with my apps.

Alright, i am gg to start work in a new company next monday! pretty sad to actually leave asia garment. though life here is indeed short lived, i have real wonderful colleagues. yes, so what if it is a chinese speaking environment and is aint as cool as other offices, the friendship here is so close knitted with the exception of that monster of course. I would have stayed on here forever if is not for that monster. sigh. cant bear to leave this place yet on the other hand, cant wait to move on in life. i will miss the thai restaurant, the shorts wearing, the daily breakfast & all the gossips. hahas. all good things come to an end isnt it. on a brighter note, the pay offered to me at the new company is my ideal pay & my sis can fetch me to work everyday! (cos its her company & i will be working under her actually)

just the other day, i saw this on my fb and thought is a damm funny joke that i must share!

Friend A said to Friend B: *takes iPhone out* hey, do you have any nice apps?

Friend B replied: Yup! i have 6 abs and they look really niceeee~~~

hahahahas

*faints*

banged!

2010-10-25T10:11:00.005+08:00

last week, have been a pretty rough for me. i have resigned at my current job and am also offered a new job at another company. however, i am still contemplating whether should i accept that job offer or not. pay is really disgustingly low however, it sounds pretty fun! how now brown cow. would you choose to go for a job that you are interested in but with low pay or go for a job with a higher pay but it doesnt interest you that much? mind you, i am not taking any allowance from my parents now & have loans to clear. sigh.

however, this weekend is special to me because, i am banged! (pls dont think in that dirty manner) I SIMPLY................ SNIPPED OFF MY FRINGE! I have been contemplating this for a while already and i have done it! well.. i have mixed feelings about this though. i dont look exactly ugly but i look kinda like cute...... which my personality doesnt exactly fall into that category. hahas. i look kinda goon too! yes, an advertisement for gong cha! hahas.

also, i went to this HUA YU WEE seafood with family on sunday. you gotta take a look at the crab (picture below) its MEGA HUGE, the largest i have ever seen in my entire 20 years of my life! not only that, the black pepper taste is damm fab! the way i am describing it now is an understatement. you gotta try it for yourself! best of all, prices are really affordable!

after dinner, bought UDDERS ice cream home too! MAO SHAN WANG & Hazelnuts! two of my favourites at UDDERS. thinking about it just makes me salivate! hahahs

on a random note, this my sis's newly bought strawberry bedroom slippers! cute ttm pls! pardon my fat legs.

Halloween party on the upcoming sunday! i have not prepared a costume for it! :( any suggestions?

2010-10-18T09:31:00.003+08:00

drawn by joy, the designer who have gorgeous talent and sitting beside me!

the weekend flew past real quickly and its monday again!

caught "life as we know it" on sunday with cg peeps and damm, its so romantic. sucker for such romance comedy though the ending always lead to the same outcome. i call this running away from reality since you can rarely find a guy that sweet anymore.

also, jex was just saying that the year is coming to an end really soon! i was thinking about this while i was on my way to work and just listing down goals which i set out to accomplish. ok, to be frank, i actually forgot what are the goals that i have set out for this year. hahas. i can only remember about going for a holiday! which i did! the Hong Kong trip with matt, thun and jenny was the first trip i went with my friends! it was mega fun having to find ways around in a foreign land and you cant really speak their language. what an experience. thats the fun part about travelling aboard. more to come! phuket in January with kel, colin and px! now now now, i need to save and learn some basic thai language. hahas.

I NEED A SERIOUS DIET PLAN. i am getting disgustingly fat and i hate it. ok. i know i am damm random but can anyone please tell me how to control my diet. my mouth crave for snacks every hour and have the weirdest cravings. i badly wanted to eat prata bomb last night! thankfully, i cant drive, if not, i would have zoom down to simpang for it. i need some motivation to slim down, maybe like having eye candy coming to me and say, i love slim girls might do that trick. hahahas. ok, i was just dreaming. everyone have rights to dream right?

its been awhile...

2010-10-15T10:24:00.006+08:00

I have decided to revive this pretty little thing of mine cos once again, i am too bored in office. oh well. this blog serves to occupy my time when i have nothing to do in office (which is getting pretty often like that nowadays)

I like my new blog layout. simple, elegant and pretty. 3 in 1. hee. just like me. nah. i am just kidding.

life has been pretty slow paced for me nowadays. routines like waking up at 710am, catch bus 15 at 755am and hit the office by 830am. pretty good i am say since i reach work on time! like finally! hahas. (but this is because a bet with gan jia liang, he promised me starbucks!)

now now now, you must be wondering why i can actually get ready within 30-40 mins since i am known to dilly dally. this is because, over the two weeks, i have decided to do away with one little step in my daily dressing up! Nope! is not make up! It is my HAIR DRYER! i have decided to abandon that evil black thing (EBT) because my hair is getting wayyyyyy tooooooo dry! it can be comparable to the skin of crispy fried chicken drumstick at KFC minus away the oil. It has been 1-2 weeks since i last touched that EBT, and true enough, my hair's condition has improved by leaps and bounds! i should have done this earlier. save my time in hair drying (thus, i can sleep longer!), save my money on hair treatment and achieve healthy hair. beauty can be easy.

alrighty. i shall get back to making this pretty layout look good.

till then,

2010-01-24T13:56:00.002+08:00

I just read through NTU, NUS and SMU's admission documents online.. somehow, i feel rather fearful.. i dont know whether can i make it into any of it.. but i am praying and really believing God for yet another miracle in my life. Last year, i got into the director's honors list, this year, i wanna maintain my position on the director's list and get a place in Ntu/Nus/Smu. it has always been my dream to go into a local university. i shall keep my faith level up and not get beaten down by all these difficulties in my studies.

Pastor preached an awesome sermon yesterday like he always do. He reminded me of myself, i am one of those that hold on to God's blessings so tightly, treating it as if God will never do another miracle in my life anymore. When pastor said, if God can do it for you once, he can do it all over again for you. I need to learn to trust Him more and less of my capabilities. Because the point where my strength ends, its where his grace begin. I wanna eat, live and breathe using his grace. I wanna do well in all aspects of my life because of his grace.

God, do me a favor and secure a place for me in NTU. i promise i will be good.

2009-12-27T23:40:00.001+08:00

i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo. i am not emo.

thun, this is for you :)

2009-12-23T02:02:00.003+08:00

you know there are some people in your life that are so special to you that you never ever wanna make them pissed or angry at you.. becos when these special ppl actually really get pissed off at you, it means you are really hopeless.. like even your bestest pal cant handle it..

and i am having this feeling right now becos of some words i said last night.. damm.. sometimes i just hate myself..

i dont know whether will you see this but i really wanna say that i am sorry.. you aint a wall because walls will never give me morning calls daily for half an hour each time.. walls will never make me laugh like how you do..

2009-12-22T20:50:00.002+08:00

its 8.50pm and i am still in school! can you believe it??!! first time in my life and i am ALL ALONE. please applause for me right now. hahahas

i told myself i am gg to finish my POE project today but have yet to finish it.. ohh man.. i think i am gg to mug overnight today.. i really wanna get it done before christmas... omg... i dont know why but i lost the touch of doing projects.. i cant seem to crap as much anymore... God! i need wisdom!!

yay! matty is coming to pick me up sooonnn!!! shall supper first then continue with this POE project

2009-12-18T00:06:00.002+08:00

BLACKBERRY BOLD WHITE

Please come to mummy soon!!!

no, this gorgeous have yet to be mine. the one that i cam whored with belongs to matthew ng. i hate him for all the beautiful things he has!!! this white one is really a beauty as compared to the usual blackberry. its like my heart throbs! hahahs. no iphone for me cause i love my nails too much to ever trade it in for touch screen stuff. i nearly died with cheryl's samsung. i used it for only 4 hours? before i changed back to my usual nokia.

so this christmas, i hope a nice santa would grant me this wish. i promise i will be a good kid from now on. santa wont you plsss......................

love,
yan bing

2009-12-10T16:51:00.002+08:00

REAL WORK has just begin.

i think i am procrastinated long enough that the pile of stuff i have to complete is enough to use up my time till the end of the year.. this means, no more long naps, no more random shopping trips. its just school projects, reports and many other stuff.

this is the power of procrastination. its a bad habit i form since i started poly or even secondary school days. I am a girl that never believe in consistent studying. i dont believe in doing tutorials every week cos i will jolly well forget everything when it hit exams/tests. i have tried consistent studying during Os. true enough, its just not my style. i have this habit of leaving things till the day before datelines. this is very bad as i get unnecessary stress all the time but actually love it to a certain extent as this stress actually trains me to be more cool headed and not get beaten down no matter how bad situation gets.. weird i know.. i am trying to change too.. hahas

well.. i guess i have a new goal for 2010 already..

2009-11-29T23:27:00.002+08:00

Time really flies!

i cant believe tml its the day i am heading back to school and once again, vbus and ole bb will be one of my top hits website in my lappie. hahahs. but i am really glad to be back studying.

i am back here just trying to keep this blog alive since it has been dead for the last few months. hahahs. i dont even check my blog anymore.. so yeah... just a short update as of now.. i will be back with more stuff soon! hahahs

love all of you!

2009-10-13T22:47:00.002+08:00

GRADUATION TRIP! HONG KONG 8 APRIL 2010 - 13 APRIL 2010

LALALA. you will not believe how much it costs. $363 for 2 person!!! Yes, include taxes and two way ticket!

and the best part is, matty is giving this trip to me as a bdae present!! *dances around*

2009-09-20T10:22:00.002+08:00

this is what happens when two bored interns talk to each other,

some words are covered because matt ng actually typed his address and IC number out and sent it to me. hahahahs. though very lame, this actually made me laugh in front of my laptop during work and keeps me sane from all the busy-ness of the week.

one word for the week: TIRED.

you dont wanna know my schedule that i have for the last week cos anyone in the right time would have exploded.

Monday-Work at CDL till 6 pm
Tuesday- Work at CDL & Elm
Wednesday - Work at CDL & Elm
Thursday- Work at CDL & Elm
Friday- Work at CDL & CG
Saturday- Work at CDL & church (usher duty)
Sunday(today)- Work at Elm (full shift)

i dont even have a social life anymore. but i really thank God for friends who always make the effort to meet me and also entertain me when i am bored with all these schedules. I thank God for jackson and sean that will always pop by at least once when i am working at elm. I thank God for pei xing that promised me that he will pop by today at work. I thank God for cheryl thun for taking over me on some days at elm & her constant listening ear whenever i needed to rant. i thank God for kelly that pops by with her driving licence. I thank God especially for matt! though being in KL, the constant emails that you sent makes me feel as if you are not away at all, that you are still in fact, very within reach and close to me. I thank God for my mum, for daily nagging of "remember to drink more water", her awesome breakfast that kicks start my day and making sure i still have a place called home where i can run to whenever i am so tired. I thank God that despite all the negativity in this world, i still have a bunch of people that sticks by me.

2009-09-10T22:58:00.002+08:00

RESULTS ARE OUT. omg.. but the system could not be log on. i am worried and stress enough already.. i am keeping my fingers cross abt my GPA falling..

results on sms shows a distinction, 3 B+s and 1 B... no prize for guessing which subject scored distinction. hahhas.

omg.. login login login!!!!!!!!!!!!! argh.. hate lousy websites.

2009-09-08T09:45:00.004+08:00

hello CDL! yup.. this will be my attachment company for the next 3 months. would be in the corporate communications department. thank God i have the same company as michelle. at least there is someone that i can go for lunch with on the first day of work. hahahas.

Today marks the last day of my holidays and matthew pal is flying off to KL for his internship! i am so gg to miss him. there wont be anyone else that i can go matt~~~~~ or laugh at every sentence that comes out from his mouth. talking abt him, the other day when we went out, he went to buy SHILIN chicken and i got him to ask for a plastic bag. he tried to speak in chinese and ended up saying, "wo yao yi BAO zhi dai" omg.. the man at SHILIN started to laugh so hard.. yi bao is like one whole packet of plastic bag. hahahas. tell me, how not to laugh at this boy.

tml marks the most anxious day of my life. results are coming out and its also the first day of work. i really pray that all things goes well. esp my results! OMG.. damm scary pls.. but in God i will trust.

I was reading PK's blog yesterday night.. got reminded of God's unconditional love. you know how we always tend to treat God like a friend and think just like any other friend, he will love us less if we make a mistake or something.. but this is so untrue. God love us just the same each and everyday. from day one when you were nothing till now even as you are rich and successful, he loves you JUST THE SAME. his love was never dependent on how successful or how righteous you are. it is all the same. isnt it amazing? you can be the worst sinner on earth and yet he loves you just the way he loves the pastor of the church. however, dont take his love for granted. there are still things he hates just the same forever. he loves the sinner, but not the sin. God, thank you for this great love. because of you, i was able to stand up and be stronger girl

2009-09-07T00:14:00.002+08:00

I COMPLETED 5.8KM RUN TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

for a fat mega pig like me, its a lifetime accomplishment. hahahhas. of course, i have to thank the two boys for running with me. without their constant "encouragement" while going through the ordeal, i dont think i would have completed it within the time i did. i actually plan on walking through the 5.8km. hahahas. it feels so good... i know it may be peanuts to many.. but you have to give me some credit that its my first time running 5.8km.. even when i go to the gym, its only 3km at the max. hahahs.

ok.. after one week of slacking, tml, its back to face the real world once again. SIP launch is tml.. and work starts on wednesday. do keep me in your prayers. i wanna get a good internship! something that will not eat into my weekends!! i better start sleeping early and adjust my body clock back to normal timing. hahahs. i better head to bed now.

2009-09-02T23:04:00.002+08:00

caught final destination 4 today.. i nearly died in the theatre.. omg.. the 3D effects are damm real and good but that is also what makes it scary.. omg... i was covering my eyes most of the time during the show.. i dont understand how can anyone watch with a straight face.. ahem.. for example the person that watch with me.. hahahhas. obviously it wasnt a show i wanted to catch.. cos i am never a person that is into such shows..

i am so excited abt tml.. i decided to throw all my programmes out of the window (other then work) just to do something special.. well.. its a secret.. cant wait.. and i am doing it alone.. so exciting.. ok.. shut up..

anyway, i went to the gym today.. and it further encourages me NOT to go for the run on sunday.. i feel like being a chicken on sunday and back out.. but i will hate myself for giving up.. sigh... how now brown cow.. hahahas.

2009-08-26T23:54:00.002+08:00

EXAMS ARE FINALLYYYY OVEERRR!!

so glad its all over but i am kinda worried.. nonetheless, let me enjoy my one and a half week of pathetic holidays.. poor thing i know... one and a half week.. what i can even do..

i am gg to do a few things during this one and a half week. i need to be faithfully going to the gym already!! i am having this yellow ribbon 5km run on sunday.. i know 5km might be easy pea for some of you.. but if you know me.. you will know its a HUGE sacrifice.. considering i've been snacking like as if pocky strawberry's factory is going to close down anytime soon.. hahahhas. so yeah.. 5 km.. i better start training.. if not you can just be prepared to see my face on newspaper, "GIRL, 19, DIED WHILE RUNNING YELLOW RIBBON'S RUN" whatever. i make a bad news reporter. who cares. theres a reason why i hate media relations. hahahas.

anyway, all my dear friends, i am stuck recently in this really tough decision to make. This decision will affect my life GREATLY.. so i need to make a wise one... Should i get an E71 RED STEEL or E63 RED? i have to say E71 looks better in every single way and has better functions.. however, it does come with a price of $98.. E63 is more bulky in nature, however, it weighs lighter then a 71 and its FREE.. yes.. why do E71 and E63 seem so cheap.. cos of the plan i am using to get the phone.. from past experience, i should always op for the free one (partly because i am a cheapskate when it comes to technology) but on top of it, my phones usually dont last.. so losing it or even with someone stealing it, it wont hurt me as bad.. anyway, i heard from my mum the case of someone stealing my phone, i actually have an insurance to cover it! muhahha. my mum buys all sorts of AIA plans man.. and i will be an avid supporter of this plan.. this is the second time i am claiming from this plan so far.. because i think i have two words carved on my face "PLEASE STEAL" yes.. one is a pickpocket, the other is a blatant thief.. so if i do get to claim money for my lost phone.. hmmm.. it would be like getting E71 for free too.. sigh.. tough choice luh...

2009-08-23T17:51:00.002+08:00

i suddenly lost all motivation to study though i am not done with events management and accounting... deep down within i am scared of exams.. but i just dont feel like writing, reading anymore..

maybe its the weather

maybe i am just plain lazy

whatever..

motivation... where have you gone to? you need to come back quick.

feel like gg for a run right now.. but its raining...

2009-08-16T22:56:00.002+08:00

"But how I am on stage is exactly who I am, how I living my life is exactly the way I had envisioned it to be" - Lady GaGa

i really kudos her talent in music. she daring-ness and all just gave me a sense of honesty.. like.. its just her... whatever that she wears, its just her her and not anyone else.. dont really care what does others really think..

i wonder when will i ever be like that..

i always want to be someone that doesnt give two hoots about ppl who are always trying to get me down. whether is it through their constant criticism or their own insecurities, i always tell myself to just ignore them. but i have to confess, i aint that strong. i still pretty much care about what ppl say and think about me.. sometimes i behave the way i behave not becos i want to, but more like i have to.. and its not easy.. there are times in my life i wonder "who am i?" "who is this girl that is staring back at me in the mirror?" "do i know her?" but i thank God that i dont struggle with that question for too long.. becos i know, i am always a daughter of christ.. that even if i die without the world knowing who tan yan bing is, its alright.. as long as God remembers me and remember to bring me to heaven, its all alright. hahahas.

from that one sentence from Lady GaGa, i began to learnt the power of imagination! the fourth dimension that pastor yonggi cho writes about.. its not just a christian thing, but its just a very real life thing.. the difference is that when you are a christian, God can empower you to complete it.. what do you envision yourself to be? a top CEO running a business? the top banker? if you can see it, you can have it! why is having a great vision so important? becos when u have a vision, you will mould your life according to that vision. i have a vision of gg to NTU.. that explains why i study this hard for my tests, exams and chiong for projects. there are alot of ppl around me that study for the sake of studying (no offence really.), from them, you will often see their lack of energy and commitment in project work and even in their own work. that simply becos, they lack a vision for their studies. WHY do u wanna get that diploma? WHY do you want that degree? just a paper to put inside your resume? i wanna be a successful business woman next time when i grow up. i know degree doesnt necessarily mean i will be successful.. but at least its a good starting point and something i can fall back on if i decided business is not my type.. at least i have a degree and can work somewhere, be a director or something.. i love the energy that ooze out from business.. maybe it runs in my family DNA.. but i simply love business.. thats my vision and i am glad i am working towards it..

enough said. i am starting to study for friday -media relations! NTU 2010!

2009-08-15T00:21:00.004+08:00

the power of PROCRASTINATION.

i've been telling myself to study and all.. but i seem to be so tired and lathargic every night. someone please motivate me. i dont wanna cry when exam starts on friday next week..

got back some of my coursework grades. by the grace of God, for my corporate communication subjects this time, i got B+ for both. i just need to work hard for exams to secure my As. My accounting i got an A already.. but anything can happen, so i shall not be complacent. well.. for my special interest tourism... sigh.. dont talk abt it already.. if i can get a B+ for my overall grade... i "sun ba" and i cross my heart that i will go on a 40 days fast. (i am just kidding luh)...

time check: 12:26am.. and i am feeling sleepy... hahahas. how to study like that.

before i go,

The Men's Rules

*all are numbered 1 on purpose

1. Men are NOT mind readers. ( FIRST & FOREMOST RULE )

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just tell us what you want!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question..

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..because we don't disturb
you while you are watching your soaps and serials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We all do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will ! act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. !

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Racing or Football.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. ! Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that ? It's like camping.

2009-08-10T19:31:00.002+08:00

I FINALLY WENT TO TOWN TODAY!! OMG. call me a mountain turtle. i nearly got lost at the train station due to ION. whatever. i am happy nonetheless.

went town with bro and sis. its been so long since we last hang out together.. sigh.. just short of one sis before it become a siblings outing. hahahs. Bro was really sweet to bless my sis and i a hundred bucks for shopping! i was shocked when we were standing at the shoe shop, just trying on a pair of shoes each and he simply said, we'll get both of this. hahhas. you bet girl and i was thrilled! however, i realised the stuff at far east is getting more and more expensive. God knows what happened to the shops.. is like.. pants are selling for $59? and the quality is barely there.. werid. i guess bugis is the only cheap place left to shop.

ok. after this desired of hitting town is fulfilled, i am getting back to my mould hill of tampines. exams is next FRIDAY. and i have yet to even start studying. God Bless my soul.

"was i dreaming or was it true? that you were actually looking at me."

2009-08-06T19:27:00.002+08:00

alright. i am really tired. like to the max... i feel like gg home RIGHT now.. but obviously i cant... i am hunry and tired.. what worst combination can this get..

i just ended the most stressed out day of my week.. with a test and also an event today.. i was the MC and its my first time being MC.. (ok, dont consider cg) but seriously, its really the experience i had in cgm that gave me the courage to accept the MC challenge when i was asked to.. thank God amy and i pulled through great.. though at some point in time, the tutors when really quiet.. hahhas.

SIT test was really CHUI. i am gg to die with it.. i crap so much that i dont even know what i was writing. i just hope God will make that miracle.. sigh.. i better stop being complacent and start studying for EXAMS..

however, i really feel like gg on a holiday.. i feel like just gg some island and chill for an entire day without worrying abt anything in the world.. when will i ever get to do that?

2009-08-03T23:51:00.002+08:00

hello earthlings!

How do you do?

my life has been pretty hectic nowadays.. and its just gg to get worst from today onwards.. i will be working almost everyday for 2 weeks due to some fair my boss has.. i still have tests and projs submission.. then it will be exams.. then shortly after that, its internship.. ohh God...

i have a test of 12 chapters on thurs yet i find no motivation or stress to get started.. it must be the chill out session with matt this afternoon.. went to eat an expensive laska at TMCC.. ohh well.. have to say that place is like heaven.. away from all the chaos of the world.. i love the toilet! i can just stay and live in there seriously.. hahahs. call me a noob or whatever luh.. becos of that, i just feel quite stress-free now.. sigh.. MOTIVATION!!! 12 chapters to cramp in within 2 days!! and i only have a few hours a day to study.. so.. i just have to do it man..

i read this joke just now and i thought it pretty funny.. but matt insisted (and he is still insisting) that it isnt...

Question: What did the teddy bear say when he was offered dessert at the restaurant?

Answer: No thanks, i am stuffed

HAHAHAHAHAS!!

ok.. Next,

Question: How did a dumb blonde fell onto the floor?

Answer: She tripped over the CORDLESS phone.

HAHAHHAHAHHAS!!

not funny meh?

2009-07-26T10:18:00.002+08:00

omg.. i feel so so terrible today..

i couldnt sleep well last night cos of my really really sore throat(my voice is like a man now) and my blocked nose.. i had difficulty breathing and my throat is hurting me whenever i talk.. i woke up really tired yet sick and yet, still have to work.. someone save me..

thats the thing abt working in a small shop, theres no one to take over you if you are sick.. the other part timer is down at a book fair and i am the only one left.. i hope i can make it through the day..

sigh.. if i am not well by tml, i am gg to the doc.. yes, stubborn me refuse to see the doc though i was sick since wednesday..

one thing good abt this sickness is that i get to slim down.. i dont have any urge to eat anything cos anything food that goes down my throat is like cutting it.. thats how terrible it is..

2009-07-23T15:23:00.002+08:00

dont know whats wrong with my health this year.. i feel sick once again last night.. down with fever and cold.. but my fever is gone.. just left with some cold.. omg.. i wasnt that weak to fall sick twice in a year.. i think i better start taking vitamin C pills.. and talking about vitamin C pills.. its rather expensive you know.. like $13 for one tube of tablets.. i expected it to be like $7?? ok.. maybe i am just too cheapskate. hahahas.

i am currently at home slacking/yet worrying for my last group project next week.. cant wait for it to end.. however, hope that i can do well for it cos its media relations.. one of the subject i hate.. i wonder why did i even choose corp comm.. but sigh.. cant change my electives.. like what leong CC said, "choices will breed consequences" i am determine to score well for this subject! though i scored quite badly for my test, i believe i can still Ace or at least B+ it! just beliving God for a miracle..

alrighty.. my body is aching.. i better go back to sleep before gg to work.. yes.. i am still working later.. this explains why i hate irresponsible ppl.. its just in me that i dont like to push responsibilities away..

2009-07-22T01:17:00.002+08:00

i feel so unjustified yet i cant do anything.. not even flare up.. i am trying so hard to control my anger on that matter.. ohh God...... pls pls help me..

2009-07-19T21:24:00.002+08:00

suddenly feel so so stress just now. i just realised how crazy my this week is gg to be.

1) Monday- Event Management project submission tml!!
2) Tuesday - HSBC interview
3) Wednesday- Work
4) Thursday - SIT Presentation!!! + Work
5) Friday - MC script + goodie bag for CEM

Following week,
1) Monday-MRND Submssion

OMG. so many things to cope... i need superman...

while i was so stress, decided to read pastor kong's blog.. and i came across this verse that he typed, 'unless Gos builds his house, those who labour will labour in vain".. such a common and simple verse, yet it serve as a form of encouragement and reminder to me.. In whatever i do, much as i have the talent, skills or ability, it is still Gos's handicraft that made me who i am today. my future, goals, dreams and even my As, is all dependent on HIM and never on myself. Yes, i still study and do my projects the best that i know how.. but ultimately, it is HIM who make things happen!

I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me!

2009-07-14T18:30:00.002+08:00

i seriously hate myself.

i just bought 3 pairs of shoes all in one day. hahahs. but its cheap lah.. it only cost me $15 in total for 3 pairs... they are those kinda of everyday shoes.. not those drop dead gorgeous kind.. hahhas.

i am really gg to start setting aside 10% of my salary on top of my savings insurance. yup.. i need to head down to standard chatered asap.

anyway, the internship position at HSBC is actually a corporate communication position.. i am considering whether do i even wanna go for the interview.. its like... i am not that good with corporate communication.. i only got a B and B+ for my corp comm sub last sem.. and my recent corp comm test is really bad... cos corp comm is really something i dont like.. sigh.. tough choice.. the only thing that interest me in this job is the events part! i love events luh. all the freebies.. hahahhas. do really pray hard for me.. my interview in next tues, 4pm.. first time going for a real interview at such corporations... damm scared.. :(

2009-07-13T15:57:00.002+08:00

God's most AMAZING grace.

pls really pray for me as i am shortlisted for this internship at HSBC. however, i would need to send my resume and go for an interview if they are interested. so really pray for the favour of God and man upon my life. this opportunity is something i would have never imagine.

thank you jesus! :)

2009-07-11T01:30:00.002+08:00

i have decided to have another bank account!! likely with standard chartered. i am gg to get one with NO ATM CARD and PASSBOOK. seriously, its just gg to be an account with money. hopefully tons of it. hahahas

why am i doing this cos i am too ill discipline with an atm card by my side. to me, whatever money inside, its all for me to use. rainy days dont occur to me.. hahahs. but ever sicne the trip to POSB the other day and thinking about how my money just disappear after my pay comes in, makes me realised a need for this invisible bank account. hahhas. so yeah man. i am just gg to force myself to stop shopping and eat good food for every meal. yes, i am back to poor old days.. hahahas. i hope i can survive.

2009-07-09T12:58:00.002+08:00

transformers 2 is DA BOMB!! i love it to bits!

finally caught transformers yesterday!! OMG!! DAMM NICE!! i know many ppl been saying about megan fox boobs and all.. to me, i think those who said that are just plain perverted cos the fact you notice the boobs when there are so much action gg on. hahahas. i nearly cried when prime optimus died at the start... he gave himself just to save a single human being.. and i love bumblebee!! he is just plain cute and ever so encouraging when he told sam, "i will be nearby when you need me" and he really is.. where ever sam went, he is always two steps behind, protecting him.. his loyalty is seriously awesome! thats better then a boyfriend!! hahhas.

Thanks keith for the treat and company!! cos the WHOLE WORLD seem to have caught it except you and i. hahahas.

ok enough. a project submission tml. hahhas. but i am 2/3 done through editing.. no late nights!!! yay!!

2009-07-03T23:28:00.002+08:00

bing,

i know you hate corp comm.. i know you got into this elective without even knowing what it is. nvm, since you are in it, you should just make the best use out of it! just this last sem with journalism and you are done with it. you would be free like a bird! dont focus on the present pain, focus on the joy you would gain in the future! score those As and move on with life. this is just a process, not an end.

love,

bing

(sometimes, you just need a little self motivation to start doing on a project you detest)

2009-07-01T00:08:00.003+08:00

long queues irritates me. (other the really worth it sales) anything other then that, my mood gets quite bad.

my dad asked me to help him pay some fines at the AXS machine. i was already happily at home, in my pj and lappie in front of me, ready for my my show-knock knock loving you. thats when the house phone rang and i am called out of the house.

when i reached POSB, the long queue at the cash deposit machine has already tested my patience. a guy in front of me deposited 15000 using 50 dollar notes. can you imagine how many pieces of 50 dollars is??!?!! 300 to be exact.

when i head over to AXS, the queue is even longer and SLOWER. i so feel like shooting everyone in front of me dead. ok. i am just kidding. this is when i seriously thank God for internet banking. i realised the fine could be paid using IB.

but my mood didnt change for the better. my dad can obviously see my unhappiness. he washed my plate for me and brought me a cup of water to drink when i got home. (fyi, my dad usually dont even wash his own plate) in addition, i got the use of TV without him complaining much. hahahs.

said my piece, back to knock knock loving you

2009-06-25T09:58:00.003+08:00

well... its the 25th of June now and my bdae is over :( i am officially 19 now. yes. 19 only. many seems to think that i am 20 over.

To everyone to wish my happy birthday by texting me on my handphone, SO SORRY FOR NOT REPLYING. i hope you would see this blog entry as if i have the chance, i would really text back and not be so dao. Why did i say if i have the chance? COS MY PHONE WAS STOLEN on tuesday night, 23 June 2009. its a long story but i suspect is done by this Malay guy that went near my shop's counter, talked me to me 20 mins and kept asking me to take different story books for him. i am ultra sad over the case of my stolen handphone. all my years of contacts... they are all gone. thank God kel took my memory card 2 weeks back with all the pictures. i dont hold much hope in catching that guy.. just hoping for a new red phone! (most likely E71 in red) so as of now, i am phoneless... so pls dont contact me through texting cos i am yet to get a spare phone.

once again, i wanna thank all of you that made my bdae such a happy day for me!

thank you cheryl and jonathan for surprising me with a cupcake on 23rd june after work!! it was really expected that!! THANK YOU for that extra effort!! :D

thank you JUNHUI SISTER for your really awesome keychain and the treat at Mr Teh Tarik. thanks for taking time out despite having project submission the next day :D Love you LOADS.

thank you siak, nel, shand and henry for surprising me at Mr teh tarik when it hits 12am. I was seriously surprised when you guys appeared. though junhui kinda spoilt it... hahahas. but i am really touched by all of your efforts! STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE FROM BAKERIN. OMG. love it to bits.

thank you V, jenny, shirline, juls, victor for the handmade cards and present! i already thought abt when i am gg to use that gift already. hahas. really love the gift alot.. and also, the STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE from BAKERIN. AWESOME AGAIN! THANK YOU!

thank you those that took time out for timbre at night! theres really alot of you but basically cg and kel, jackson, peixing!! really touched by all of your efforts in accomodating me. you guys have school, work and all the next day, but still rushed down and stayed till the lastest that you can. (esp kel and peixing.. took special offs just for me) LOVE EVERYSINGLE ONE OF YOU. thanks esp for the knock knock loving you! yes! refer to wish list! and also, a really beautiful bracelet!! refer to wish list! still waiting for my belated present from *ahem*! you know who you are. hahahs. kidding lah. also, STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE from this bakery at raffles.. i didnt really eat it at the end as we all used it to smash at each other.. but i can smell the awesome-ness of the cream when i was busy doing that. hahahas. THANK YOU once again.

for usher leaders that celebrated 2 weeks ago. hahhas. THANK YOU TOO! THE STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE is nice!! :D and thank you jeff for the present!!

of course, i wanna thank JESUS! the source and love of my life. i would not live to see all these amazing friends by my side if its not for you! the cooling weather throughout the whole day.. i wish to believe its made esp for me cos i hate the hot weather nowadays. hahahs. you already gave me the greatest present 2000 years ago.. THANK YOU.

i hope i did cover everyone.. if not, here is me screaming THANK YOU to you!! you dont need to be any special like buy me a chanel for me to say thank you to. being my friend, staying by my in tough times, its more tham enough reasons for me to say thank you to.

on this birthday, i really experience that the simplicity in life is still the best. no chanel present or whatsoever, i am contented that i know i have a bunchies of lovelies around me! every gift, no matter how big or small, i really treasure it cos i know the thought that went into it. i cant say enough thank yous to all of you.. you are really really appreciated :)

heres a kiss from me to you!

hahahhas

2009-06-19T09:59:00.003+08:00

this birthday i have is really weird. weird that i dont have a list of things people can get for me. all i now know is that i need the following

1) A vacation to hong kong or bangkok (this is out of anyone's budget)

2) Need a revamp of wardrobe with tops, skirts, dresses, necklaces, hairbands and all (this is very subjective to my taste of clothes)

3) A watch.. hmm.. have yet to find a really nice one

4) lappie case, keyboard protector, mouse and mouse pad (lappie case is settled)

5) Chanel OR Tiffany & Co Necklace (out of budget again)

6) Daisy by Marc Jacobs Perfume

7) Sponsor for my lappie! (this means cash preferred)

8) A genie to complete my projects

9) Drama serial: knock knock loving you

i dont mind vouchers or cash actually. no matter whats the value, i really dont mind. even if its just 20 dollars or what.. i find it more practical for me to use, its better then getting the wrong present.. hahhas.

this is a super bu yao lian post. hahahhahs. like as if the whole world wanna get a present for me. hahhas.

2009-06-14T22:50:00.002+08:00

hello everyone!

bing is a happy girl today as she is blogging on her new baby at this very moment! YES! i bought my lenovo S10! hahahas. but sadly, not in red as there doesnt seem to be any more red around. got the white one instead. but pretty nonetheless!

the process of getting this was one filled up ups and downs. wanted to pay for this myself by installment.. but somehow, i ended up using my mum's credit card. now i need to clear this debt asap to prevent interest.

however, i got this at a really good bargain! paid $649 in total for 2 years warranty and a free 320gb external harddisk! awesome! i am planning to sell that harddisk away as i dont really need it anyway. this would get me about another $100 i hope.

today its the 14 of june, it means another 10 more days to yours truely birthday!! OMG! yesterday the ushers celebrated for me.. i was totally taken aback! that must be the earliest celebration i gotten. hahahas. talking abt this, i have not even came up with a birthday gift list! ok ok.. i will do it soon.

anyway, bro just flew off the HK yesterday night. he is once again away.. but the difference now is, i have my S10 with webcam!! hahahh. i just need to hao lian for awhile lah huh. hahahs. gg to get a nice gorgeous lappie case, mouse and mouse pad!

i have a request now, pls bow your heads and pray together with me for matthew ng. this good buddy of mine is taking his driving test tml! if he pass! it means car rides car rides and more car rides! and of course, a high class chicken rice at the tenah merah country club. so pls help him pray for good traffic and a good test instructor and that he will make it tml!! thank you!! he would love you alot for this! hahahs.

2009-06-11T23:35:00.003+08:00

i cant stop smiling from ear to ear right now. that piece of paper meant my dream!

after work and i got home tonight, i received a letter from tp.. i was wondering, "i wasnt late for 2 times yet to receive a warning letter... thats werid.. why will they mail me?"

i opened it up and saw, "AWARDS CEREMONY" later part of it printed, "DIRECTOR'S' HONOURS LIST"

O.M.G.

i cant believe my own eyes in this.. its something i always wanted at the end of year 2.. but my results actually decreased during year 2 to a GPA of 3.48.. i kinda gave up on this dream when i saw my results for year 2.. how on earth can a GPA of 3.48 even get into DHL.. i last heard DHL was a GPA 3.59.

This is really a miracle from God himself.

If you read one of my previous post about dreams.. abt God being able to make dead dreams come alive.. i can really say he really made it happened!

This DHL list dream was long dead and thrown away by me. i thought i will never ever get to touch anywhere near the word DHL.. but today, God did it for me!

indeed like what his word say, "Even when you are faithless, God is still faithful"

as i open up my glass bottle that i wrote down my dreams for 2009, one of it stated, "To be in DHL list" i wrote an amen on that paper when i sealed it up in that bottle at the start of the year.. and it came to pass

i can proudly say, My God is a God of the impossible!

2009-06-11T11:29:00.002+08:00

Was away in camp on monday and tuesday! Its like my first camp in 2 years.. hahahas. It was really fun and laugh a truckloads.

Now, its back to work time.

work to be done:

1) Event Management Individual Reflection Journal
2) Special Interest Tourism Individual Reflection journal
3) SIT Project
4) MRND News Release
5) Study for MRND Test
6) Event Management Group Project
7) Accounts Project

This is the price to pay when u have only 1 paper for Mid Sem.

To think, holidays is gg to be over in 1 week plus time :(

Also, my boss just installed 2 security camera in my shop. no more slacking, no more long visiting hours from friends, no more lappie. thats it, i can just die there :(

I better head out to a cafe to to my work now.. hahhas.

2009-06-05T02:44:00.003+08:00

yes. its near to 3am and i am still up.

working on something which i long long long ago wanted to do it. its still a secret as of now.. hopefully i am able to get it done by tml afternoon!

cant wait!

*i've sinned once again. i bought this gorgeous puma gold bag for only $45! :) no more spending till my next pay comes in*

2009-05-31T10:47:00.002+08:00

smart me got sis to fetch me to work at 850am. i thought its 950am.. thus, i am as early as the security guard of tampines 1. today its like my first time being on time for work.. like literally open the shutters at 10am. hahahas. cos usually i would be late for 15-20 mins.

studied at east coast park with matt on friday night. really by the grace of God, i pulled through yesterday. its my record breaking day. i went 1 day without sleep! (u dont count the 15mins rest i got on the bus while on my way to work) and the most amazing part, i dont even feel sleepy on saturday. reached home at 630am on saturday, bathe and went out by 730am, worked from 8am-2pm, then went down church for duty till night 9pm. but i must say, i did everything yesterday without thinking.. somehow, my brain cant work.. hahahas.

ok.. i need to head back to mugging+work now! :))

2009-05-28T18:31:00.002+08:00

2 tests down with 1 more to go. keep going!

i am currently at home feeling really lazy to get started on accounts which is my only paper for mid semester. i feel like going out, enjoy myself, take a chill pill and all.. but i know i cant and shouldnt. my time is tight and i need to keep a strict time schedule on myself. right now, i am going to start and finish all my accounts chapter tonight so i am can teach matt tml night. i am gg to overnight study with him and give him all my power for accounts. hahahas. i realised i am blabbering nonsense now cos i have an urge to go out but cant.. ohh God.. save me............... GSS is starting real sooonnn... cant wait..... fine.. bing, just shut up abt shopping (you already bought like 2 pair of shorts and 2 tops this week) and get down to accounts and admin stuff.... yes yes!! i can do it like bob the builder!! actually i kinda really hate the cartoon nowadays.. they are no longer cute.. like what thomas and friends, bob the builder, dora.... omg... they aint cute at all.. my generation was like winne the pooh, hello kitty... i think they are way cuter then some trains.. i wonder what get into kids nowadays.. esp thomas.. OMG pls... ok bing enough.. stop it.

"and i am slowly picking up the pieces of my life, fixing it back, one piece at a time"

2009-05-26T00:18:00.000+08:00

keep holding on.

2009-05-23T23:37:00.002+08:00

for those who have yet to know, my mum got admitted into hospital on tues night. as of now, she is still staying there, with joints all swollen as an infection in her bone caused all the pain.

though its seems things are just getting tougher, now that i have to juggle so many stuff, i am really glad that i have so many friends that are ever so encouraging and loving me through it all. its really all of their love that gives me the strength to go on. with that, i am thankful. really thankful.

today, much as i experienced great love from my God and friends, i also experienced the other extreme of people that dont love. well.. all i can say... i am a little disappointed but like i said, love its a matter of choice. i can never force anyone to love anybody.. :)

2009-05-17T12:51:00.002+08:00

back @ shop again.

i was telling cheryl of how recently i feel damm tired and exhausted easily. i dont know why. even when jacq saw me yesterday, she said "i look at your face u like can fall asleep anywhere kind" yes.. i seriously can eat a bowl of tang yuan and fall asleep at 85. hahahs.

was serving external traffic yet again yesterday. realised that despite me doing external traffic for the countless times, i would say i am still not very good at it. there are alot of things that i fail to take note of.. sigh.. but yesterday one amazing thing happened.

i was squating down looking at the pile of prayer list that i placed beside the yellow doors for the entrance for the wheelchair people. the door was closed at the point of time and my half of my body was just right in front of the yellow doors. i totally forgot that the door could open anytime from inside.. cos very few people would do so.. then while squating, somehow, i decided to stand up.. though i have yet to finish the stuff i wanted to do.. and guess what! the very next 1 second i stood up, the yellow door flung open right in front of my face and i stood shocked in front of it. really thank God for his divine protection. if not, i guess i would have laid unconcious on the floor or get one huge blue black on my head.. those yellow doors aint light.. i am really amazed. imagine i hesistated for 1 more second..

this week is gg to be an exciting week! projects to be done and my tests are coming up real soon. mugging would be just round the corner :DD

2009-05-11T09:18:00.003+08:00

do u have dreams?

i do but some of them are dead, some of them are broken while some, i am living in it.

this morning, i had an encounter with HIM. just somehow, i was brought back to remember dreams. all the dreams i have, all those BIG HUGE dreams that i use to dream when i was a child, and of course, he wanted me to remember all my broken and dead dreams. these are the dreams i safely keep in a treasure box and hid it away from anyone's view. this is a secret treasure box that is chuck in a the deepest darkest corner of my heart. i dont wish to ever remember those dreams becos it represents only failure, unfaithfulness in my life.

but all of you know that carrying a treasure box isnt a simple task? the weight of a treasure box is enough to kill you, much more with things placed inside. the amount of effort you need to hide it, it inflicts in you, nothing but fear.

HE then got me to remember a verse that jeff shared with me on saturday,

Gen 2: 7
" .............breathed into his nostrils the BREATH OF LIFE and man became a LIVING being."

HE is in a business of digging out broken and dead dreams, breathing his breath of life so that it we would LIVE in all those dreams. if you are breathing while reading this, its becos of his breath you are living. likewise, if you want your dreams to LIVE, then get that breath of life.

still dont believe that it can happen? Me too.

at first i still wouldnt believe that my dreams could be resurrected, he then said to me,

"if you cant even believe in that simple dream of yours coming back alive, what makes you so sure about your salvation, that the holy spirit did raise christ from the dead?"

i couldnt help but surrender my all to HIM again.

friends, let him breath into your life, let him breath into your dreams. Dreams which you never gave a chance to because it seem so impossible. Let God make it possible. Dreams that no one knows, but HE knows as he watches over you everyday. LIVE YOUR DREAMS, not for yourself but for everyone around. People that will be touched by it, people that will be healed by it. you dont need a "America Got Talent" in order for you to step out. RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE, step out! God is your one and only audience/judge, and best of all, he is cheering you on :)

from jeff,
"even IMPOSSIBLE is spelt as I (A)M POSSIBLE!"

2009-05-08T13:59:00.001+08:00

i need this baby. (note: not a want, its a need)

2009-05-08T02:29:00.002+08:00

I HATE PROJECTS. I HATE PROJECTS. I HATE PROJECTS.

to self:
u r not gg to flare up. chill... you are doing great.

2009-05-03T23:30:00.002+08:00

today is a badx1000000000000000000000 day. sigh... i just threw away $110 just like that. the funny part was when i told my sis, "girl, i threw $110 away today.... " she replied, "wah! where you throw at?" hahahahahahs. she really thought i literally throw $110 away. sigh... i could pretty well cover it up and no one would ever find out, but its my integrity that i am paying for. i just hope boss would show forth more of her favour upon me and take pity on me. just praying for a miracle to happen. $110 is like my two days salary. damm it.

while the day started out in a pretty bad manner, i am really grateful for friends that stick by me.

matt came over especially just becos i told him i am having a bad day. he totally surprised me cos i was still texting him when he appeared right in front of my shop. Moreover, its what was in his hands that made me thrilled! Bakerzin strawberry shortcake and 4 macaroons! (FYI: BAKERZIN STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE IS TO DIE FOR! it sends you straight up to heaven when u take a bite of it! its awesome!!! you are missing out ALOT if u have yet to try it) OMG! i was totally grinning at the cake when i opened it. passerbys must have thought this shop assistant is crazy. but whatever. i had pictures taken but i have no idea how to upload photos using my quite new nokia phone. THANKS MATT!

later at night, han xian dropped by and bought subway cookies! sinful. i ate like 4 subway cookies today. ahahas. thanks hx!!

just before i go off, a sentence which i read in Jodi Picoult's book, Picture Perfect. i thought its really romantic.

"with all the stars as witnesses, i would tell you that i love you"

2009-04-25T00:44:00.002+08:00

omg.. i am back from all my crazy work week. i suddenly feel so foreign to the cyber space cos its been so long since i last touch the lappie.

today is finally is the last day i am working for terrapinn! part of me is sad and cant bear to leave them as it has been such an enjoyable experience to work with different ones from different departments. i have to say i learnt alot and it has been certainly a good exposure for me. by far, i've participated in 4 different conferences in a short span of 1 month and 2 weeks. it has been a tiring journey too. with really late nights and all the cabbing, swissotel stay and of course, even by me wearing that organizer badge, it just makes me feel one notch above the rest, though i am just a puny temp staff. hahahs. i thank God for this job opportunity! and guess what! i am taking corporate events management this sem! and terrapinn is a corporate event management company!

however on the other side, I MISS SCHOOL ALOT! i miss all of the peeps like jenny, vanessa, juls, matthew and the list goes on... i cant wait to head back to school on monday. if u have not known, school suppose to start this week for me but i kinda skipped it to work at my last conference with terrapinn. hahahs. really cant wait for monday!

anyway, i also started work at tampines 1 already. hahahs. its just so pleasant to know cheryl is working downstairs and able to see her from my shop. though the job is not as slack i thought it was but when u get to see all the kids in the bookstore, some of them are simply adorable.. awww. i do have motherly instincts afterall.... hahhas. and i saw this channel 8 actor walking past my shop for 3 times!!! muhahha.. met jinxian, daniel, weiming and zavier there too on the first day of work.. hahahas.

thats basically what i've been so busy with.. yes, work work work and school is coming into picture soon.. really need an expansion in my capacity.. i dont know why but i feel really tired nowdays no matter how many hours i sleep at night. i am getting on with age. omg.. someone need to return me my 18 years old body.

i cant wait for tml... its probably the day that i look most forward to in a week :)

2009-04-14T22:26:00.002+08:00

decide to stay home today and be a goody girl if not mum and dad is gg to call my phone a thousand time again. i guess they just miss me too much. hahahas.

and GUESS WHAT! i found a part time retail assistant job at tampines 1 today! yup! the new shopping mall that just opened! my boss is really flexible abt my timing and work days! thank God for that. because of church, i cant work on saturdays and when retail bosses hear such part timers, they usually get quite turn off. but when i went for the interview, the boss was rather nice! thank God for his grace and mercy! yay! this is my ideal retail job! near my house and school! i like! my pay is slightly above the average retail pay! so its another miracle! do drop by if u r there! the shop i will be working in is named ELM TREE! the top level of tampines 1 and they sell children story books! maybe its a good time for my to catch up with my childhood stories! hahahas. best of all, cheryl works one level below me! hahahahs.

tml is rollarblading day with kelly and next week i am starting school / work! life is gg to be exciting! :)

2009-04-13T02:44:00.002+08:00

Dreams WILL turn into reality.

2009-03-31T22:32:00.002+08:00

SICK.

had fever today and i literally did only eat, sleep, eat sleep. did the ushers forecast at night though. today its the first time in my life that i overworked myself and fell sick. i consider myself quite a healthy baby as the last time i had fever was like i think 2-3 years back? had to leave work aside and came home. i applaud myself as i actually took the train instead of cab home. i was tempted to hop onto a cab at swissotel but forgo that idea. had to save money man. hahas. i bought my own lunch and liang cha home and took medication. i feel so independent. mum only came home in the evening to cook porridge for me.

i am heading back to work tml though i can feel that i have yet to fully recover. but just claiming in the name if Jesus that i will be made well. please pray for me. i dont like this weak feeling.

2009-03-22T22:52:00.002+08:00

i was never a fan of letting go. if you know you well enough, you know that i put my heart into everything that i do. to let go of something its difficult for me but i know i have to do it. there are things in your life you need to let go off so that something new can happen. you can never grasp the whole world in your hand unless you are God.

i was talking to roslind yesterday and i felt that i was speaking to myself instead. things that i was saying to her to encourage her impacted my own life too. its amazing how God works.

i am on a mission this week. in just 3 words: seek, knock, ask.

i wish you a great week ahead. :)

2009-03-15T01:44:00.002+08:00

i seriously dislike people who dont lead by example. you would nag at people to do one thing, but when it comes to doing it yourself, you give excuses. whatever pls. you cant do it, then you jolly well just keep your mouth shut when others dont too. you are not even qualified to judge. its like getting the best dancer in Singapore to be a judge of a cooking competition. you would be like thinking... "WHAT?"

double standard. irritating.

2009-03-12T22:31:00.002+08:00

well... some updates of my life

1) I GOT BACK MY RESULTS THIS WEEK
like what i've told many people, i dont know whether should i feel elated or sad.. firstly, i got a C+ and NO As this time round. My GPA fell by 0.05. HOWEVER, i got a DISTINCTION for my travel & leisure. i am really amazed how did i even do it. when i saw that distinction, i couldnt believe my eyes. so yeah.. should i be overjoyed that i got another distinction or should i be depress cos my GPA fell. but i am feeling more depress then joy.

2) i FINALLY sent my precious phone for repair.
just today, i gave up on my power button that was spoilt like a few months back. thank God i have a spare phone at home to last me through the next 3-4 days.

3) i've been packing lunch boxes to office since tuesday
this resulted in high savings. but i bought a skirt today :( but its only 20 bucks and its an office skirt. i bought it because i only have ONE formal bottom and the workplace i am in now is actually a formal dresscode workplace. i've been wearing jeans to office but with great fear of being told off.

4) i need to get a social life
this is self explanatory.

thats all.

something i read that really speaks of how i am feeling now,

Letting go of perfection.

It is good to remember that one of our goals in life is to not be perfect. We often lose track of this aspiration. When we make mistakes, we think that we are failing or not measuring up. But if life is about experimenting, experiencing, and learning, then to be imperfect is a prerequisite. Life becomes much more interesting once we let go of our quest for perfection and aspire for imperfection instead.

This doesn’t mean that we don’t strive to be our best. We simply accept that there is no such thing as perfection—especially in life. All living things are in a ceaseless state of movement. Even as you read this, your hair is growing, your cells are dying and being reborn, and your blood is moving through your veins. Your life changes more than it stays the same. Perfection may happen in a moment, but it will not last because it is an impermanent state. Trying to hold on to perfection or forcing it to happen causes frustration and unhappiness.

In spite of this, many of us are in the habit of trying to be perfect. One way to nudge ourselves out of this tendency is to look at our lives and notice that no one is judging us to see whether or not we are perfect. Sometimes, perfectionism is a holdover from our childhood—an ideal we inherited from a demanding parent. We are adults now, and we can choose to let go of the need to perform for someone else’s approval. Similarly, we can choose to experience the universe as a loving place where we are free to be imperfect. Once we realize this, we can begin to take ourselves less seriously and have more fun. Imperfection is inherent to being human. By embracing your imperfections, you embrace yourself.

2009-03-08T22:51:00.001+08:00

perhaps if i could ask the question why it would make me feel much better

but whats the point of just feeling much better while you know things are not solved.

:(

i am upset once again. and i detest this feeling.

2009-03-07T10:44:00.002+08:00

讓我為你而活
讓我為你而站立
永不放棄像你愛我
讓我為你前進

had cgm last night.. this part of the chinese worship song we sang just brought me to tears..

went to meet matt after cg. had a good time of fellowship. ever since work started, i miss all my friends so so so so much. my social life is turning really bad as i am so tired after work each day and must head to bed by 12am. i need an expansion in my capacity. next week i will be working overtime as the event is coming up on the 16 march. thats when i can expect ZERO social life. i am not complaining as work is quite an enjoyment. i rather work then to be slacking at home. i feel useless when i dont work. thats just me. hahahs. workaholic maybe?

results should be out next week! i am NERVOUS. to be frank, i dont think i am able to score as well this semester. i am just praying for a miracle! yes! praying for at least 3 As and 2 Bs. is not difficult actually.. but this sem has just been tough with everything..

But no matter what, i am still beliving. yes, still holding on.

heres a shoutout to all my friends:
I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN YOU! though i am not a fan of MSN or facebook and doesnt talk to you all often through the week, believe me that i really think of everyone of you! i really hope that i can be there to go out, have lunch (YES, JACQ), look at cute guys and drool over them, but my time is really tight now. even msges to me can be ignored, i am sincerely apologetic over that. I promise i will find that balance soon. :) and i really wanna thank henry and yh, thanks for always volunteering yourself to get dinner/bubble tea for me on fridays after work as you know i am a hungry monster. you are greatly appreciated.

2009-03-01T22:10:00.003+08:00

look at what jacksen tan did for himself! he actually went to buy himself a domain.

and now i have an email account with him! hahahs. my goodness!

he is such a joke

2009-02-24T08:40:00.001+08:00

"Never make someone your pirority, when you are just their option."

2009-02-21T09:39:00.003+08:00

sigh.. i dont feel like mugging today. or in fact anymore.

.....

but i still have a paper on tues :(

2009-02-18T21:17:00.002+08:00

i am so glad and happy!

i promise i will mug at 930pm. promise.

anyway, i needed to blog cos God is so so awesome and good!

i actually had every intention to go down paya lebar subway to study today. but not just to study, but also apply for a job there. ok. you know how much i love subway but i hate working in f&b line. However, times are hard and i need a holiday job BADLY. due to various reasons like building fund, totally broke, and debt clearing. so it made me desperate enough to even consider subway as an option. but i really HATE f&b. reluctant as i might me, anything to clear my building fund, i will do it. thats what i told God. i shouldnt be fussy when i choose to serve. servants have no rights to complain and i want to be a true servant of Christ.

so in the end, i didnt make it down cos i woke up late. instead, went to city hall starbucks to study with sis. while taking my short break in between studying, i kinda in my mind prayed. God, i really need a job next week. i need open doors for me. i've also been telling God i need financial breakthrough and all since last week morning prayer meeting.

my miracle came in the evening. was telling meizhen i am gg subway to work and all. then a msg came in, from my sister's ex workplace, terrapinn. i've worked there before too. this girl named claudia asked me to work part time for them as they need help for all the various events coming up. i was elated but not so as she asked me whether can i work tml and on fri. i am having exams till next tues. i told her abt the situation BUT later on she asked me whether can i work starting from wed (one day after my last paper). i was like.. OMG! SURE! hahahs. and guess what... they will need me all the way till about april! that means, my ENTIRE school holiday! oh yes! pay is not bad, $7 per hour. gg to start work at 10am that means, i am still able to go for morning PM. hahahs.

in addition to that, jackson later on texted me asking whether do i want to teach this P1 girl chinese tutition! yay! i am still waiting for his reply but i am hoping it is available! so it means extra income and i can still work even after school reopens.

:) :) my God is a provider!

2009-02-17T10:12:00.002+08:00

after one day/night of thinking and decision making, i came to a conclusion. to just really move on. i am just letting go and letting G.

G reminded me of something,

he told me about abraham and his son issac, how when he obeyed the voice of God over his love for his son. thats is why God blesses him so so much.

he is willing to lay down the son whom he love so much on that altar.

this isnt something new to me.. but its yet another step of faith and challenge to just REALLY let go. not to even have a flicker of hope or expectancy. but let go. its not easy but i will try.

goodbye my friend. memory is where you will belong.

2009-02-16T22:20:00.002+08:00

toshiba baby is finally back! oh yes! look at my beautiful "C"s and "X"s. hahahhas.

this is random. i am really excited over my lappie cos its been almost one week without it. thus the lack of being online (ok.. its not like i always go online) but my jewel is suffering.. poor girl...

anyway, theres so much i want to say and talk about that i dont even know where to begin. so i shall not start.. exams are on friday and next tuesday. please pray for me yeah!

i better stop before i type nonsense.

2009-02-11T15:58:00.004+08:00

wow. i am really amazed at God's grace and power! i simply love the past few days to the max! since monday, my life has been utmost satisfying and fulfilling! indeed, this is the light at the end of the tunnel.

to recap, monday was really well spent from going to school then the gym, then to movies, then home for dinner. tuesday had lessons till 3pm, then headed home due to headache, dinner/supper at night with a few cgms.

today(wednesday), woke up late for pm! i thought i have to take the train down.. by God's grace, past records of any morning prayer meeting, i never once took the train down myself. its either free cab or nel's dad drove me down.. today, i thought that it would be my first.. BUT! mum woke up and said she is gg for morning prayer meeting (which she never once does!).. thus managed to reach by 7am.. she then later drove me down to toshiba service centre to repair the poor injured lappie. bad news upon reaching there. the keyboard is not covered under warranty as it is a spillage caused by me. the person asked, "is the keyboard spoilt due to spillage?" i knew that by me saying a "no" or "i dont know" will mean free servicing as it is covered under warranty.. with me saying a "yes its caused by me", i will have to watch my money fly away.. but i couldnt betray my integrity. i know many will simply say this small lie to get the free warranty.. but i know and i know, big lie or small lie, its still a lie in the eyes of God. thus, i decided to be truthful. many will call me stupid, dumb that i have to pay $70 for a new keyboard. but i really couldnt bring myself to lie. i was quite upset after that as it means my allowance for this week will disappear just like that but what to do.. i brought this upon myself. so i hit the gym again after that.. was still sighing to bernard.. "i paid $70 for integrity" hahahas. i also told God secretly in my heart, "God, i believe integrity will pay off with good rewards" so while on my way home, toshiba called me! i was like.. "wow..thats fast" then the person on the other line asked me about the spillage.. how did it happened and all.. and GUESS WHAT! he told me, "for the keyboard, i will claim it under warranty for you" i was like.. "ARE U SURE?" hahhas. hence, i dont have a pay a single cent for it! God is good! indeed, integrity pays off well!

2009-02-06T17:21:00.002+08:00

i am really stretched in my capacity to love people

too many things has happened this week that i dont know where to start from.. but it is also one relaxing week..

yesterday night, the door of my room slammed shut on me and it was locked. well.. call me stupid, dumb, whatever, i left the master key INSIDE my room. yeah.. but i really thank God for daddy! he helped me opened the door somehow and i dont have to pay for the locksmith to come.

today morning, i realised my thumb drive went missing. you dont know how dependent i am on that small black thing. my reflection journal which i am suppose to hand up today at 5pm is inside.. you can feel how frantic i was in the morning.. woke nel up 2 times and i think he is gg to kill me for it.. sigh.. dont ask me how that thumb drive went missing.. cos i dont even remember it falling out of my bag.. i purposely tie a long lanyard to my small thumbdrive to prevent myself from losing it.. but i still did anyway.. and at the most crucial moment..

sigh.. i am depressed.. i feel like a job (the character in the bible)..

but like him... i believe God will restore all things which i lost.. not just the same.. but 30 fold, 60 fold and a 100 fold..

TO MR S.A TAN:
i just wanna let you know, i am not so easily defeated.. the girl you are fighting against is one ultra solid, strong girl.

2009-01-31T01:37:00.002+08:00

i dont know how long more can my heart wait
i dont know how much more can my heart take
cos baby, i need you here right now

2009-01-29T22:28:00.001+08:00

The story of 4 candles

The Four Candles burned slowly.
Their ambiance was so soft you could hear them speak...

The first candle said, "I Am Peace, but these days, nobody wants to keep me lit."
Then Peace's flame slowly diminished and went out completely.

The second candle said, "I Am Faith, but these days, I am no longer indispensable."
Then Faith's flame slowly diminished and went out completely.

Sadly the third candle spoke, "I Am Love and I haven't the strength to stay lit any longer."
"People put me aside and don't understand my importance.

They even forget to love those who are nearest to them."
And waiting no longer, Love went out completely.

Suddenly...

A child entered the room and saw the three candles no longer burning.
The child began to cry,
"Why are you not burning? You are supposed to stay lit until the end."

Then the Fourth Candle spoke gently to the little boy,
"Don't be afraid, for I Am Hope, and while I still burn,
we can re-light the other candles."

With shining eyes, the child took the Candle of Hope
and lit the other three candles.

Never let the Flame of Hope go out.
With Hope in your life, no matter how bad things may be,
Peace, Faith and Love may shine brightly once again.

Author Unknown